Children of a Murderer

𝓣𝓦𝓔𝓝𝓣𝓨 𝓞𝓝𝓔 - 𝓦𝓘𝓛𝓛𝓘𝓐𝓜

I never thought I would be alive for My Clara's funeral.

I always thought I was going to get caught. Well, at least a part of me always thought I would. I was certain I would slip up, or My Clara would tell someone. But she never did. She kept that secret until her very last breath. I hope she died painlessly, she deserved it. She deserved a long life, handsome husband, loving children. Things I could never give her, things I could only dream about with her. She knew just as well as I did. It was the very cause of My Clara's death.

This morning was particularly sad. Evan was crying, wailing. Elizabeth was crying too, though she was quiet. Micheal was staring at his food, not moving. I expected that from him. He knew what today was just as well as the rest of us.

"If you three are done, I suggest you begin to get ready. Guests will...they will arrive within the hour," I announced. "Lock your bedrooms whenever you are done."

Elizabeth and Evan got up together, walking towards the stairs. Micheal was still sitting down, staring at me now. "

"Did she die in peace?" he asked. 

He knows. He knows I was on the phone. He knows I heard her. God, how could I be so careless? Think, William, think.

Micheal's words snapped me back. "Dad? Do you think she was at peace?" he asked.

"I don't know, Micheal," I responded. I felt relieved. He doesn't know after all. "No one ever will know besides her."

Eight days. It had been eight days since I last saw Clara alive. Seven days since I last heard her voice. Five days since I saw her last in her final resting place. The children weren't with me the last time. I had gone alone.

"I'm sorry," I choked, grabbing her hand and squeezing it. "You didn't deserve this. Any of this. I'm so sorry, my dear."

She didn't respond. She didn't even smile or move. I wish she would have wrapped her arms around me and hugged me, telling me we would figure this out together. 

But she was cold, pale, and emotionless. She was not Clara. She was not My Clara. She had been claimed by Death now, along with her mother and Charlie. 

"Please," I whispered. "Please don't leave me. Please."

Now I stood in front of my son, having nothing to say to him. "Go get ready," I said. "It'll take your mind off of her."

Micheal stood up and walked to the frame. Just as I was about to turn to follow him, he stopped in his tracks. "Nothing will ever take my mind off of Mom," he said. And with those words, he disappeared up the stairs and into his bedroom.

Curse you, child.

I went up to me and Clara's bedroom. I had moved photos of her into here, as if she was always around. The house was bare, I had already gotten rid of some of her stuff. Her closet was the only thing I couldn't touch. I couldn't let it go all away. Just in case if she comes back. She needs clothes. 

I dressed myself in the suit we got married in, paired with the same purple tie that matched her purple flowers. I stood in front of the mirror and did my hair the same way I had, making it look neat but still messy. I stood in front of the mirror, searching. Searching for a smile or a warm welcome of my wife next to me, hearing Elizabeth scream for help. I felt her presence as she would smile apologetically before disappearing to help our daughter.

She wasn't really there, she never was anymore. The house seemed dimmer, the children were depressed, I was a murderer. 

Haha, William. You are a murderer. You killed your wife. You killed your niece. You killed your children's love for you. You truly are the cruelest person, and you have to be that way.

"Daddy?" a small voice asked. I turned around and saw Evan at my feet. "I need help w-with this belt."

I bent down to my son's level and looped the belt through it's holes. "Just like this," I said. "Clara always wanted me to teach you this. I guess we never had an occasion that we needed it."

"Mommy wanted me to teach you this?" he asked. He sniffed. "I miss her, Daddy."

"I miss her too, Evan. I really do," I said. "Go and lock your bedroom. I think guests will be here soon."

Evan nodded and walked off. I stood back up and brushed my suit off. 

The memorial for My Clara was upsetting. Her side of the family was here, Henry, Glinda, Mr. Emily. My mother was here, unfortunately. She did do well with keeping the kids occupied, besides Micheal who clung to my side. A few of our old classmates came, including Aaron and Jamie. I didn't recognize a lot of people but they said they were friends of My Clara's so obviously they were welcomed.

Later, I found myself sitting at the end of my eldest son's bed, listening to him thrashing and flailing. 

"Dad," Micheal said. "Dad, where is Mom?"

I turned to my son. "Micheal, you know she's dead," I said.

"Right," he shuddered. "She's dead. Right. Dead. Yes."

And so I sat for the rest of the night, staring at my son while he slept. Fantasizing over the many ways I could strangle him, end his misery. Though I couldn't because it would be suspicious if my wife and eldest son died a week apart. Attention would be on me and I cannot allow that.

SOO IK IT WAS SHORT DONT COME AT ME

but hey guys im back from new yorkkkkk

it was super preppy there i highly recommend !!! 

this was a quick chapter, i felt as if i needed to get something out and make clara's death get over or smth idk im probably going to do a big time skip bc im highkey unmotivated rn

ill see how i feel on wednesday

BTW !!! 

this chapter is coming out as soon as i finished it bc i feel bad

so with this chapter you will also get wednesday's usual and sunday's usual !!

an E ways

thank you guys for all you have done with votes, reads, whatever! 

best rank: #10 in sl (sister location)

TYSM!!!

drink water eat food !!

-bee 0...0