Lilies and Lullabies

IX. Dance

Our relationship feels like a breath of fresh air, it's calming and peaceful. He never makes things that can cause me to overthink at night, he became sweeter and his efforts doubled. He's not just loving me, he's offering me peace… in addition to that, he's also becoming a loving brother to Mirae, he's also making sure that he shows love and respect for my Mama. 

Of course, it's not always as peaceful as you think, we also quarrel over simple things. We bicker a lot in things that we can solve by talking but sometimes pride will take over us, nonetheless we won't settle the night without talking about it and saying sorry for being hot-headed. Madalas namin pagtalunan ang routine ko, my lifestyle isn't as healthy as his, I have a fucked up sleeping habit and my body clock is already broken. After 6 months of being in a relationship with him, I got to know him more. 

He's not just a makulit and sweet brother, he's a mama's boy. We visited his mom a lot. If we have a free day, we would just sit beside his mom's grave and talk about different things, especially when he was just a kid. I saw how genuine he is as a person. His eyes are sparkling as he tells how his mom cooked for him and Daze. He even told me that Tita Selina used to read a bedtime story to put him to sleep, and how she used to hug him if it's raining and there's lightning and thunder. 

“Sleep early tonight, Miko, you have a flight tomorrow.” he reminded me so I nodded while packing my suitcase. 

It's my first international flight as a flight attendant, the exciting thing is I'm with Mira and Liam for this experience. Sa Japan ang flight bukas and God knows how I'm looking forward to it. I've been in the sky many times already but there was something in the clouds that I wanted to see closely. I was dreaming to see it in front of my eyes, not just admiring it from afar, but now… nakikita ko na. It was a glimpse of freedom, something I'll surely fulfill when the right time comes… someday.

“You have work tomorrow?” I asked him.

He shook his head, “Wala po, isasama ako ni dad sa Palawan the day after tomorrow para sa isang project. I think we'll stay there for a week,” 

“Don't be hard on yourself, hmm?” I reminded him.

He was strumming his guitar, I think he has a new song. 

“Of course, love.” he answered, I sighed and stared at him through the screen.

He also sighed and gave a downward smile, “Stop worrying about me, mahal, you know that I can do this, right?”

“Of course,” mabilis kong sagot, “I just don't want to see you feeling bad again when he's mad.” 

Seeing his pressured face when he's calling me at night after his work is just so hard to see. He's doing his best but he's not being acknowledged right. He's being discredited by his own father.

Am I bad if I told you that I still hate his father for putting pressure on him since his mother died? He was imprisoned by his father's commands and expectations, Silas faced all that by himself because he doesn't want to involve his brother? He's basically the second choice, they're neglecting him… not just by his father but his whole family except Liam and Daze. 

“Don't worry, I'll handle that, Miko.” he assured me.

“Silas, I love you…” I whispered, his smile grew wider after hearing that. “Uuwi ako sa'yo after a week, I'll give you a hug.” 

He chuckled, “Hug lang?” 

I glared at him jokingly, he laughed at my reaction. “Sabi ko nga hug lang. Hatid kita sa airport bukas.”

I was about to answer but he spoke, “I know you'll go there with Mira and Liam pero walang mag-didrive ng kotse pabalik kaya ako na.”

Hindi na ako nakalaban sa katwiran niya dahil tama naman siya. I just texted Mira about his plan so Liam doesn't have to bother and think about his car. The next morning, it was 3 a.m and I prepared myself. I didn't bother to eat since I know we'll take drive-thru later. Tulog pa si Mirae kaya kay Mama na lang ako nagpaalam nang tumapat sa bahay ang kotse ni Silas. Bumaba lang saglit ang tatlo para magmano kay Mama bago kami tumuloy sa airport.