Lilies and Lullabies

XVIII. Freedom

I spend my time with them. Making memories as much as I could so when they missed me, they have a lot to look back on. I may not be there in the future, but those memories lingering in their minds will stay. Umaasa akong kapag naaalala nila ako ay hindi luha ang maging kapalit. I want them to smile as they remember me. I want them to be happy. 

I decided to bond with them one by one. Just like today, I'm cooking with Mama. I wanna try cooking for them, dadalhan ko na rin sila Lola. 

“Mag-ingat ka sa kutsilyo, Emiko.” bilin niya sa akin. 

Hinahalo niya ang nakasalang na ulam sa kalan, habang ako ay naghihiwa ng gulay at sahog para sa iluluto naming sopas.

I chuckled, “Ma, matanda na ‘ko. I'm not as young as Mirae.”

Natawa si Mama sa sinabi ko, “Baby pa rin.” 

We focused on cooking, my heart was full of contentment after seeing the food we made at our table. Agad akong yumakap kay Mama, I want her to know how much I love her and how I want her to become my mom in my next life… if ever I'll be born again. 

She rubbed my hair and kissed the top of my head. I laughed when Mirae joined our hug. I love them so much. 

“Ate, nood tayo ng Inside Out, please.” Mirae clasped her hands and gave me puppy eyes.

I pinched her cheeks and nodded, “Can we watch it later, Mirae? Puntahan ko lang sila Lola.”

Her eyes twinkled, “Can I go with you instead?”

Tumingin ako kay Mama, nagpapaalam kung p'wede. Nang tumango si Mama ay tinanguan ko si Mirae at sinabing magbihis na siya. I drove our motorcycle, but I made sure that Mirae is wearing safety helmet and such. Hindi rin naman ako mabilis magpatakbo kaya panatag ang loob ni Mama na ligtas kami. Dala ang pagkaing niluto ay dumiretso kami sa bahay nila Lola.

Inaya kami nila Lola na magsimba sa malapit na simbahan dito sa village. I thanked God once again for giving me the best people in my life. I also said sorry, I know my choice is against my religion, but I know He understands me. 

Nang bumalik kami sa bahay nila Lola ay tinulungan kong mag-bake si Tita para sa meryenda. Si Lola at Mirae naman ay nasa labas at gusto matuto ni Mirae kung paano mag-crochet. 

“Tita, thank you…” I mumbled. 

I think I haven't thanked them enough for helping us when we are lost. Actually, they're not really blood related to us but they still treated us like family. Fred was maybe a monster to me, but his family was never. Tita Jaycee helped and protected us from him. Lalo na si Lola, anak niya si Fred pero kung ituring niya kami nila Mama ay para niya kaming kamag-anak. It was her who decided to send her son to a facility. And I thank them for that— for being a family to us.

“Para saan naman, ‘nak?” ngumiti siya habang sinisilid ang mga cupcake na nagawa namin sa oven.

Tita doesn't have a child and husband, but seeing how she treats Lola, pati kaming mag-anak, I know for sure that she'll be a good mother. 

“Sa lahat po.” ngumiti ako.

“Masaya akong naging parte ka ng buhay ko, Emiko. Alam kong gano'n din ang Nana,” saad niya.

After putting the baked cupcakes that I designed, we went out to the garden. I saw my sister smiling and looking so proud in her crochet. Lumapit ako kay Lola at yumakap sa gilid niya, she giggled and caressed my cheeks.

“Thank you po, Lola.” I sweetly said. 

She inhaled, “Ang apo ko,” she trailed off, “Ikaw ba'y ikakasal na, ha? Nasaan ang nobyo mo?”