Chapter 6. Wounded Feelings

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What we are researching: How do children and adolescents' environment affect their feelings?

What's new: What feelings did people with anorexia and bulimia experience?

What We'll Learn: Why Eating Disorder Statistics Don't Reflect Reality?

1. "But how big and ugly he was!" The duck looked at him from all sides and flapped her wings. "A terrible freak!" she said. "And not at all like the others!"

The poor duckling did not know what to do, or where to go. And he should have been born so ugly" ("The Ugly Duckling" Andersen G.H.).

2. Various factors such as gender, fashion, peer groups, educational and family influences, evolving socialization and physical changes (hair growth, acne, breast enlargement, menstruation) place children in unknown territory with vulnerable body images (Hosseini S.A., Padhi R.K., 2023) [1].

3. 42% of students in grades 1-3 want to lose weight. 81% of 10-year-olds are afraid of being fat. 46% of children aged 9-11 years "sometimes" or "very often" diet. 35-57% of teenage girls adhere to crash diets, fasting, self-induced vomiting, and taking diet pills or laxatives. In a campus survey, 91% of women admitted to controlling their weight through dieting (National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Related Disorder) [2].

4. An environment that causes deep wounds. What did the mother duck think about the newly hatched chick? What did others think of him? And what did he think about himself for a long time? And how did this affect him? The tale of the ugly duckling perfectly illustrates the world of glamor. Their stereotypes of thinking and behavior miraculously repeat the images of the characters in the fairy tale. By re-reading this tale again and asking yourself the above questions, some may understand the ugly duckling's feelings of pain. The attitudes of others and attitudes toward himself wounded him deeply and have affected his behavior for a long time.

• Body shape dissatisfaction, low self-esteem, negative peer pressure, and young age were significant predictors of ED risk * (italics author) (Alfukha M. M. et al. 2019) [3].

* ED (short for Eating Disorders) - eating disorders.

* ED (short for Eating Disorders) - eating disorders

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5. Negative attitude towards yourself. "And he should have been born so ugly" - this is how the unfortunate duckling thought of himself due to the influence of those around him, including the mother duck herself. Research shows that children and adolescents are influenced in this way by their environment, including even their closest friends and family. I have stories of well-known and completely unknown girls and women who have experienced the full power of such influence. However, it is important to remember that the beginning of this influence began to destroy their psyche and body, long before the first symptoms of eating disorders appeared (III fr. 5. 3, 4). Of course, not everyone shares their private stories from childhood and adolescence, and I am convinced that their position should be respected. I will give some stories that are essentially similar to the tale of the ugly duckling and present them in the form of a free retelling.

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