Stigma || Kim Namjoon

49

Soo Yun...
This might be the last letter I'll ever write to you.
I keep reliving in my mind the memories of us.
My body is aching.
I can't even move.
I think my time has come,
I tried to stay strong but it's not something I can decide.
I keep reminiscing about the times when we would plan our future together.

'Don't be sad. Even though we don't
know what will happen to us in the
future, it's better to just think of the
present. The future is far from us now.'
I told you as you were staring at the ceiling sadly.
'So you'll never let go of me?' You asked as you looked at me.

'I promise I'll keep loving you until
I can't walk anymore, until I take my last breath.
When that time comes I'll let go of you but it's still early to think about that.' I promised you.
I'm sorry, Soo Yun.
I think that the time has come for me to let you go.
I didn't break this promise because I told you I'll leave you when
I take my last breath and I'll take my last breath soon but
I'm sorry for breaking our other promises.
I loved you and still do more than you can imagine.

There was so much I wanted to tell you but I just can't now
I don't have time and I don't have the strength to write.
My muscles are getting weaker and my fingers are hurting for pushing
them harder to work when they can barely move.
Don't worry I'll tell you everything I want to in our next life,
when we meet again I'll hug you tight and never let go of you.
Go on with your life. Move on and be happy.
If you're happy, I'll be happy.
Just know that when my soul leaves my body
that you'll be the last thing I'll think of.
I'll imagine your smile as my soul
departures my body.

I'll let go of you in this life but
don't expect me to let go of you
in our next lives.
I've learned my lesson and won't
repeat the same mistakes I did in this life.
We'll meet again. Goodbye for now.
I love you. I love you Soo Yun.
I love you more than anything.

To: Soo Yun
From: Namjoon
November/29/1942