Ashes of Vile

48

CHAPTER FOURTY-EIGHT
PART FOUR: Arcadia's Awakening

Cassidy Idgen desperately attempted to conjure the source and in every minute wasted, she furiously blamed herself. August Vile cut a piece of her shirt with her dagger and wrapped it around her hand. "Sit" She commanded Cassidy. Cassidy harshly flicked her hand over and over but the source was not appearing at all. She cursed under her breath. "My power is not enough to fix millions of scars."

"You fixed mine, let me fix yours." August delicately said.

Cassidy momentarily looked at her and then away. She sat on the floor and touched the rough live flesh of Arcadia who was awake but not responsive. She needed the source in order to get Arcadia to respond to her will. But she was tired, weak, and discouraged. She had all the motivation, and even that was not enough. August softly pulled up the back of Cassidy's, revealing the long and deep slash on her back caused by the midnight rider. She dabbed the bright red blood and she could hear the tiny winces of Cassidy. She adjusted the pressure of her touch and the pain was more bearable.

"I want them to hang me, August. For truly I can finally experience death's kiss." She said in the silence. She felt August's abrupt stop but the dabbing continued. "I always felt suffocated. Not until I met you anyway. You taught me how to properly breath."

Cassidy turned around and looked deeply into her eyes. The eyes she liked so much even when it constantly looked like it felt nothing. And it did. It felt nothing. "Remember when you asked me if loving you makes me want to die?"

"I have the answer now."

August Idgen was frozen.

"All I want, August Idgen, is for you to be loved in all the ways you won't allow me to."

"This isn't love, Idgen."

"And how would you know?" Cassidy challenged. "Because I feel nothing for you. What you think you see in me is fraud. I don't want to be loved, and I don't want to love. And I can't."

"You're obviously not repulsed by it." Cassidy's voice was raspy. "I never understood why I still didn't feel true power even with this gift I have. But this– us, you, you make me feel powerless yet so full of it. And I know I make you feel things, make you question yourself. I can see it in your eyes, Vile. Your fear. It's tremendous."

"I love you, August Vile." She whispered into the dark.

"Don't say words you don't mean, Idgen."

"It's true. I do love you. Everything about you. But that must be a lie too for you disgust me and the thought of longing and craving your touch is the doom of my existence. That's not living. That's suffering. Loving you is suffering. And Vermithis, how much I hate suffering. I want out of this labyrinth."

"I tell you repeatedly, Idgen. This is not love."

"Your words no longer bare any value. What is love if not bearing one another's scars?"

"If you insist" August said darkly, and pulled down Cassidy's shirt to cover her wound. She stood up and stared down Arcadia. Then in a millisecond, Cassidy unwarily could not stop the following events that happened. August slashed her own dagger on her back and blood spilled out. "LET'S BEAR THE SAME SCARS, IDGEN. WHY DON'T WE TOLERATE EACH OTHER'S PAIN? HEAL MY PAST, IDGEN. I'LL HEAL YOUR PRESENT. SHOW ME WHAT LOVE SHOULD FEEL LIKE. SHOW ME WHERE AND HOW I LOVE YOU. SHOW ME BECAUSE YOU KNOW SO DAMN WELL."

"You're crazy. Stop it, Vile." Cassidy nervously watched August Vile hurt herself with no control. "NO, I WANT THE MOST POWERFUL PERSON IN THE WORLD TO SHOW ME LOVE WITHOUT POWER. YOU HAVE TAINTED ME ALL SHADES OF BLUE, IDGEN. BUT DARE YOU WON'T SHOW ME THE SKY."