"sorry, i fucked your wife." blitz croaked, flashing a razor-toothed grin at prince stellar before getting out of that courtyard before he noticed the priceless artifact of his tucked under her arm and murdered her for stealing it (and for fucking h...
Blitza Buckzo (now known as Blitz, just Blitz, and you'd better not make the mistake of pronouncing the A in her name) paced in front of a whiteboard in her boardroom. Her employees, two other imps called Moxxie and Millie and a hellhound called Lunar (who was also her adoptive son), sat at the table, listening to her.
"Okay, team. So I know business has been a bit slow recently. It's no-one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here... Moxxie." she said, ignoring the boy's irritated expression. "Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?"
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"What about a car wash?" Millie suggested, grinning.
"This is Hell, Millie. No-one cares about cars being clean." Blitza said. Then she got an idea of her own. "What about a billboard?"
Moxxie rolled his eyes. "We can't afford a billboard, ma'am."
"Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now." Blitza deadpanned before shoving him away. "Have you all forgotten what service we provide?!"
Murder was what they provided. They killed people in the living world who had wronged or killed the Sinners down here in Hell. Not that any of them would forget it, because how are you supposed to forget what your own job is, but Blitza forced them to watch a video of themselves murdering targets anyway as a reminder. They ate popcorn as they watched it. "Ah, those were the good times." Blitza said, smiling and leaning forward on her elbows as if she was watching an old tape of her wedding day or something.
"I don't need any reminder, ma'am." Moxxie groaned. "Considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week, one that you then additionally paid to have run for a full 3 hours on a channel nobody watches."
"Uh, hey. Excuse me? What's obnoxious about a fun jingle?" Blitza snapped. "It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spinnin' bullshit!"
"People love musicals, ma'am." Millie supplied.
"Exactly, Millie! We're basically doing a musical!" Blitza said. "And Moxxie? Are you gonna crush my musical theater dreams like my dad did?"
Moxxie blinked. "Ma'am--"
"'Cause right now, all I see is my dad's asshole talking to me!" she went on, turning away from Moxxie sadly. "Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside!"
"You trying to crush her dreams, Moxxie?" Millie asked.
"I-- what?"
Millie scowled and turned away, crossing her arms. "I thought I knew you."
"I can't believe you, Moxxie! And after I made you Employee of the Month too!" their boss whined, holding up an unattractive picture of Moxxie that looked like it had been taken when he was just about to sneeze or something. Being Employee of the Month isn't much of an honour when there's only 3 employees here anyway, but Moxxie had admittedly been kind of happy when Blitza did that anyway. It had made him feel special.
