Remember Me?

fifteen

Have you ever felt like you have done the exact same thing, again? Twice. Ever.

Where you specifically know it has happened before, to where you question yourself?

To the point where you are so set on knowing that you're mind is playing tricks on you.

I've kept myself in my room for a few days now and Harry has tried getting Kaycee to get me to talk this out with him, but I've ignored all of his pleas he told her to tell me.

It's really a dumb reason to coop yourself in a room over, I know. But I have a werd feeling that I need to think about everything. And I can't face him, I don't know why, I just feel so confused over such a little thing.

It feels so wrong. Yet more than so right.

After he told me he liked me, I freaked out. It's not even an 'I love you' but it felt even more meaningful, and I didn't know what to do. It just made me feel so confused like a ton of bricks just hit me. I'm just confusing myself now.

I felt like I couldn't control myself as I ran out of his bedroom and I couldn't look back as Anne called for me.

All I wanted was to answer a simple question. Do I like him back?

Scratch that, I found that I have already answered it. I do. I do like him back, but I am definitely not ready to admit that to anyone but myself. Selfish, right?

Selfish to everyone I have been hiding it from. I feel it's a good thing. I should be able to think through this, but if only I could figure out the right way to do it, without talking to him. Right? No...this is so wrong.

Why am I making such a big deal out of this? He has kissed me before, why is the fact that he almost kissed me again hitting me harder than the first time? I should just talk to him. But I can't. Ugh, It's not that I can't, It's that I don't want to.

I feel too embarrassed to face him after I ran out like a child.

"Why can't I sort myself out.." I groan, as I lay back on my soft bed I have been hidden in for the past days.

A few minutes later, I hear a soft knock on my door.

"Come in." I sigh, and casually scrunch my eyes as I watch as Stella walking up to me.

"Hey, kid." she greets me.

"Hey, what's up." I say, suppressing my tugging thoughts.

"I know you've been sick this past week, but we should go out. The fair is ending in two weeks and I wanna go before it gets too crowded." Stella tells me, and I groan, remembering that I told everyone that I was feeling sick.

"My bed is so nice to me though." I grumble, and she laughs.

"You literally haven't left your room in three days. We are going outside." she tells me, and I stick my tongue out at her. "And hey, I'm nice to you too!" she adds.

"Fine, but only for you, I guess." I laugh, actually wanting to now have a good time, to forget about why I've been sticking with my thoughts. "And you're lucky I'm feeling better today." I laugh, even though I was most definitely not ever sick.

"Awesome! Now go get ready, I wanna leave here by one." she smirks, before unlocking her phone.

"Alrighty." I breathe, as I jump out of bed to go fix myself up.

"You really are feeling better." Stella smiles, still looking at her phone, as I enter the room, ready for the day. "Looking way better too." she finishes, and I roll my eyes.

"Ready?" I ask, ignoring Stella's statement about my appearance.

Stella automatically looks up. "Yep."

We head downstairs and I find my mom cooking brunch. "Hey, mom. We're going to the fair. I'll be back later." I smile, actually feeling a lot better than I was a half an hour ago.

"Alright you girls. Be safe, and make sure you call me. Want some of these sandwiches I just finished?" she asks, and I shake my head, still thanking her. She nods, and I smile, before kissing her cheek, and heading out to Stella's car.

When I sit in the passenger seat, Stella smirks. "Let's go."

"Don't get too frisky today, Stell. I have got to keep an eye on you" I giggle, as Stella turns up her music.

"To the fair we go." we laugh, before turning onto the highway.