A Hero in the Dark: 2nd Edition

Chapter 112: Yer Consent

I was hesitant to walk in at first while his mom's sleeping, but Henry insisted I come in. "Wouldn't want you to wait in the dark," is all he said. I still can't believe it. It just seems like the biggest coincidence ever, the biggest leap of faith, the longest streak of luck in my life.

Henry stopped to take me to Paradise that day, and well, I thought I saw him for the last time. Naya then, when I left her, I didn't know if I'd ever see her again either. I watch the old woman breathe in a deep sleep, quite softly, while the crickets chirp outside—I vaguely wonder if Pixie is amongst them. I frown, in thinking of what she'll say when she wakes up and sees me. I don't mean to come only when I need her; it's just, she's the only one that I can think of that might have a clue as to what I'm supposed to do now—without my ex-alien boy. I don't mean to upset her for showing up so unexpectedly. "So..." Henry starts, quietly so as not to wake her. "What brings you to Okinawa to see my mum, Emily?"

"I—" Shit. What am I supposed to tell him? Naya never asked me about my past or what happened. There was always this mutual understanding, a connection. I don't know what to tell him about what's going on, or even if I should. "I came to ask for some advice," I decide.

"Right. Mum's usually helping as many people as she can, be it by herbal tea, sage wisdom, or pleasant talks. Everyone comes to her if they have a problem, but I wanna make sure she ain't takin' on more than she can handle," he says. "What kinda advice are ya lookin' for?"

Not really knowing why or how, I tell Henry of my situation: being brought back to life only to experience the break-up of an eternity. I don't tell him much, but he's patient with what I do say, only speaking up once I break for a breath. "Ah, and yer looking for a way forward."

"Well, not exactly," I say. "I just wish I knew what to do. I never wanted this; I was just upset. I got caught in the moment, and now—"

"Now you don't know how to fix it." I nod and hug my midsection because my stomach is starting to hurt. "May I ask what happened between you two, you and yer ex, that is?"

I freeze, but inside, I'm shaking. "I—well, it's kind of a long story and it's, um, private."

He laughs at that, half-heartedly, and Naya turns in her sleep. "Lemme guess," he interjects. "It's gotta do with somethin' in the room. Right? He cheat on you?"

"What? No. Nothing like that. John—He wouldn't do that."

"Then?"

"It was just, um, it was in our room; that much is true, and I wanted him." I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, trying to decide if I'm telling him too much about our private time. God, I hope not. "He said he wanted me too, but the weird part was that he didn't really, um, take me ever. He said he wanted to try something new, so we did, but it didn't feel right."

"You tell him that?"

"I did, I think. I said I was scared, and he assured me everything was fine..."

"And? Ya believed him?"

"Yeah, but there was something off about him. It's like he didn't care, like, he didn't care how I felt or anything even though he said he did, like, he just—He had his fill of me and when he was satisfied, he pushed me away. It's like I didn't exist anymore..."

"Ah, I see how it is," he says.

"You do?" I don't know why that terrifies me.

"Sure. He didn't force ya to do anything did he, though?"

"Force me? Force me to do what?"

"To—" He looks towards Naya and lowers his voice. "To have sex, little lady. To have sex, or anything of the sorts. Yeah? He didn't, did he? He had yer consent?"

"Oh, no, yeah," I say, a little jumped that he would even think of that. "Of course. I wanted it. We both wanted it," I assure him. "It's just, it wasn't what I thought it would be and I felt almost... empty when it was over. I don't usually feel like that."

"How do ya usually feel then?"

"Like, full? Satisfied. Emotionally sated, I guess." I shrug, unsure how else to describe it.

"I got it," he says. "I think yer very wise to end it when you did then."

What? "I am? You think, what, I did the right thing?"

He smiles a bit, though it doesn't last long, then leans back on his mat and relaxes. "Sure. Seems a bit unfair to me," he says. "Almost like he used you and tossed ya away."

I look down at my feet. "He did," I mutter, thinking back to what I told him. I try not to cry, but even thinking about that day is enough to make the waterworks cascade.

"I'm sorry," Henry utters. "It's a terrible thing. No one should ever use a person like that, but unfortunately, it happens to a lot of us." I wipe my eyes with my thumb, but everything still feels heavy inside me. "But hey, if it was bound to happen, least it happened sooner 'stead of later, right? Now you know he isn't right."

I shake my head. "That's the problem though," I spit. "I don't. I still think John's the right person for me, even if he's an alien. I've never had a boyfriend before, but there's something about him—something about us—that felt good, natural even."

Henry nods, as if he anticipated this. "You felt safe with him. It's understandable. But did ya feel safe with him then?"

I think about that for a second longer than intended. "I always feel safe with him," I murmur. "It's one of the reasons why I love him. But that night... it was different. It's not that I didn't feel safe—I did—but... he was just weird."

"Maybe you just need time apart from him. How long's it been?"

"Almost three weeks," I tell him. "Seventeen days to be exact."

"Well, looks like a vacation is just what you need," he notes. "How long you stayin' for?"

"I was thinking a week. I'm supposed to be home by the first of September anyway."

"Top dog," he yelps under his breath. "Ya picked a good spot for a weeklong vacation then. Why don't ya get some sleep? We'll talk more 'bout it in the morning, yeah?"

"Talk about what in the morning, Henny?" Naya asks, rubbing her eyes and taking me in. "Oh, is that really you, Emily?" She drags herself up to her feet to make her way over to us, then wraps me up in a warm hug. I nod behind her ear, smiling. "How are you, dear? Good? Healthy?"

"Yes, thanks," I say. "Sorry to wake you. You can go back to sleep if you want."

"Oh, don't be sorry, dear. I wake at this time every day. It's no big deal. Talk to me; what brings you to Naha again? Did you find your friends? How are they?"

I sit back again, glad to be back in Naya's presence, and I fill her and Henry in on all the details; we talk long until the sun comes up.