Love Sick

26

⚠️ A/N: hi guysss so a very bad trigger warning in chapter bcuz this one is more on the sadder side and the way Rylie thinks and the way she's trying to process her emotions in this chapter is very sad and a very real struggle in the world, I am not in any way trying to glamorize and/or romanticize drug abuse/mental health because it is a real thing that many people in the world are struggling with. ⚠️

RYLIE

My eyes flutter open, and I lift my head and scan my eyes over the room I see the whole group scattered across the room.

Aaron sitting in front of the bedroom door with his head leaning on the door. Dylan on the floor, next to Kaseys bedroom window that oversees the neighborhood street with a pillow under his head and a blanket covering his body. Grayson is sitting on Kaseys desk chair with his head leaning on her desk. And Kasey is in bed, next to me.

I passed out last night in Aarons arms when I found out the truth.

I need to talk to Zach.

"Rose," I hear Aarons deep voice say. I eyes roam to him, and I give a blank stare. "You hungry?" he asks, I shake my head as I try to give him a smile. "Want me to take you home?" he stands up and dusts off crumbs that were scattered all over his black jeans. I nod, as I kick my legs over the bed and jump onto the carpeted floor.

"C'mon lets go," he creaks open the door and put his hands out for me to grab, and I do. he gently guides me down the hall, down the stairs, and out the front door to his car.

"Wait, what about my car?" I ask, he looks to me as he opens the passenger door before making his way to the drivers seat.

"Give me your keys, I'll drive it back to your house after I drop you off."

Deja vu.

I take a hesitant step towards his car. "No, it's okay I can just drive my car."

He softly chuckles, his shoulders moving with the vibration. "Rose, you aren't in the right mindset to drive right now." he tells me. "C'mon I can drive you, it's not a problem." he insists.

And without another comment I comply and stagger my way to his Jeep. I just want to go home.

***

We stop at a red light. "How are you feeling." he asks in a low, soft voice.

I take a second to reply as I stare at the red stop light ahead, "I don't know." I whisper to deep into my thoughts to process what he asked me.

"Do you want me to stay with you when I drop you off?"

I nod, if I'm alone I dont know what I'll do. Especially to myself.

"Okay, but I'm going to need to drop you off real quick so I can go get your car." he explains to me. I simply nod and lean my head against the window.

It's rainy today.

***

I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling.

Why would he do this? I just want to know.

I trusted him so much even though he treat me like shit half the time. I changed for him, I did shit I didn't want to do.

He manipulated me into thinking he actually loved me, and I fucking believed it.

I hate him so much.

And from one second to the next, I have the bottle in my hand. I read the label, opioids it reads.I have tried so long to stay sober, I really have. But I just can't do it anymore.

I have fought, and fought for happiness. For fucking months, but I can't fight any longer. I need this.

I screw the lid open, and grab two tabs.

I pop them in my mouth and swallow.

I just want to be happy.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

MONTHS EARLIER

"Here," Ally shoves a small, orange bottle into my hand. "Hurry take it."

I look at her confused, her plum purple hair swaying in the light windy hot breeze. I take the bottle from her anyway. "What the hell is this?" I put it up into the sun light.

She immediately snatches it from my hand and scans the park for anyone that happens to be looking at us. "What the fuck are you doing?!" Ally whisper yells to me. "Thats what you asked for. Those are opioids." she points to them.

My eyes almost pop out of my eye sockets. "When I said I needed some shit I did not mean fucking opioids." I whisper the last few words incase someone nearby hears.

"What did you mean then?" she quietly shouts.

"I dont fucking know, maybe just some weed like a normal person!?"

She pinches the bridge of her nose. "Look Rylie, you said you needed something to take the edge off, this shit takes the edge off." she points to the bottle. "Here, look." she grabs the bottle from me before looking around the park, no one is here.

She grabs two tabs out, and places one of the blue tabs on her tongue and closes her mouth and then she swallow. "Your turn." she puts her hand out to give it to me.

"Uhm no, I'm okay." I push her hand away.

She scoffs, "You made me drive twenty fucking minutes to deliver this shit to you and now you won't take it?" she says it like a statement. "Just take the fucking pill, Rylie." she shoves it between my lips.

I grab it with my tounge and it's officially in my mouth.

I swallow.

"Good girl," she puts the pill bottle back in my hand, "I'll see you at school, okay?" she smiles to me.

"Yeah, okay bye." I quietly say.

She turns around as she continues to walk. "And you'll be thanking me later, Ryls. Just don't take too much at a time." she turns around once more towards her car.

What the fuck did I just do.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A/N: guys my bday was yesterday/today (it's 12:23 when i uploaded this)!! anyways guys university starts soon im hella nervous so if y'all have any tips lmkk

AND ALSO so sorry the chapter is like really short I wrote it pretty quickkk cuz ive been busy alll week planning for my bday party on Saturday!!