Before Doesn't Matter: A Mericcup Love Story

Chapter 19

>Merida<

I run blindly through the forest. I couldn't stay there. What he had done to himself was almost unforgivable. I just had to get away. 

Why did he do it? Am I not enough? Am I not good enough? Was it something I did?

Is it my fault?

I tripped and fell on to the cold ground. When I saw the cut on his wrist, long forgotten memories began flooding back into my mind. 

I don't want to die!

I sit up and cover my ears, trying to block out the memories.

But I don't want you to die! Because of me!

I back up against a tree, still covering my ears. 

You'll understand. One day. When your older.

No matter what I do, the memories wont stop.

Lilly's accident wasn't your fault.

"no" I whisper to my self

I just want my freedom! Thats all I want!

But are you willing to pay the price your freedom will cost you?

I close my eyes.

"Stop" I whisper

Be brave.

I can't stop the memories from flooding in. So I just give in.

"Lilly!"

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>Merida<  7 years old

I sat on my bed, playing with my dolls, when I heard house door open and close. I was confused until I remembered that my mum was outside doing laundry.

"Mommy?" I called to the person at the door. I didn't get an answer. "I'll be right back" I told my dolls.

I got off my bed and walked into the living room to see who came in. 

"Lilly?" 

I saw Lilly sitting up against the front door, her head and arms were on top of her knees. She looked like she might be crying. 

"Lilly?"  I walked over to her. "Lilly, are you okay?" I asked trying to get her attention.

She still wouldn't look up at me. She just sat there. I was starting to get a little worried. She isn't usually like this. And she never comes home so early. 

"Lilly? Why are you home? School doesn't end before lunch time. Were the kids being mean again?" 

This got her attention. She looked up at me and I could see that she was crying. 

"Are you okay?" I know it was a stupid question, but It's the only thing I could think of. 

Lilly wiped the tears from her eyes and smiled at me. I smiled back and assumed that she was saying that she was okay. 

"I think I'm going to be okay soon" Lilly said with a smile.

"Really?" I asked her happily. Lately, Lilly had been acting really sad so, I was happy to hear that she was going to be okay.

"Yeah. Really." She continues to smile at me. "You know what would really make me feel better? Candy."

"Candy?" I asked confused. Lilly doesn't usually like candy.

"Yeah. And you can go and get some from town if you want" she reached into her bag and pulls out something. "Here's some money I've been saving for something special like this."