Back and Forth (A Castle Fanfiction)

Truth and Lies

Kate's P.O.V
--------------------------------------
The world seemed... so bright. I felt like I was standing on the sun. But- it wasn't hot. It was just... empty. Everything was empty. The only thing I could feel was the stinging in my cheek. My hand rose as I felt the freshly bruised flesh. That was when I realized where I was. I had lived this nightmare before.

The world came back into view, and suddenly I was on the ground, looking up into the fury of my father's scornful gaze. It was months earlier again, and he bitterly demanded, "Get out of my house, and don't ever come back." I just stared at him this time. My body didn't move. I knew most of this was only a memory, so as soon as his back turned on me, as soon as he walked away, the image faded into dust and I was left alone.

This time, however, unlike in the past, when the image faded away and his voice disappeared, I felt a tearing pain stab through my stomach and rip through my body. I could feel the baby moving as though he was panicking. He was kicking and writhing far more than he ever had before as though his life depended on it. The pain got worse as my hand rested over my son and just as I managed a glimpse at my stomach to see that nothing was wrong, I heard my father's voice telling me, "You're going to fail him. You're going to fuck up everything that you have. Every ounce of happiness you've ever experiences will be ripped away from you, and you will be left with nothing, just like your mother and just like me."

When I could bare no more, I looked up, and suddenly the blank room turned to a ballroom, and the floor I had been sitting on became a chair. All I could see, however, was my lover smiling down at me with crystal blue eyes, holding out his hand to me and he slightly bent forward in his tux and asked, "Might I have this dance, Mrs. Castle?"

My lips lifted into a smile and I took his hand gently, suddenly realizing how easy it was to get up. He spun me once in a ballroom twirl and when I looked down, I watched a white dress float out from beneath me, my baby bump one hundred percent gone. I was no longer pregnant, and for reasons I couldn't explain, that thought didn't bother me one bit. Rick took a step closer, dropped both of his hands along my waist, and never let his eyes once look anywhere but my eyes and my lips.

As my hands folded behind his neck, I watched him and only him. I watched our world disappear around us. I watched our lives dance about in his eyes, and all I could see was serenity. Then, his words became a sweet song to me as he told me, "I didn't think I could ever love you more than one I first saw you walk down that isle today, but- I think I love you more."

"I love you too," I told him honestly, as though it was the easiest sentence in the world.

His smile lasted a moment longer before my head fell gently against his chest. I closed my eyes for only a moment, and suddenly the sensation of being slapped across the cheek forced me away from the writer. My hand came to my cheek and I could feel that the flesh was heated. After having stepped back from him, Rick stepped toward me and placed his hands softly on my arms, asking, "What happened?" Suddenly the world flashed. The world flashed and I was suddenly back outside my father's house. Rick continued, "What did he do to you."

"Nothing," I lied to him in shock, "Let's just go."

"Did he hit you," he asked me directly. I couldn't answer. I couldn't bring myself to tell him. He then begged, "Kate, look at me." I couldn't. I couldn't do that to him. "Kate, please." He pleaded in slight desperation. It killed me to have to do this, but I turned my chin up toward him so that he could get a glimpse at the injury. When he did, my memories turn and he chuckled a bit. "Finally. Someone knocked some sense into you. I've been wanting to do that since the day we met."

"Rick, I- I though-..."

"You thought I loved you? Ha! How could anyone love something as damaged as you? I just wanted to stick it in, and you made yourself opened to me. I mean, come on, Kate. Do you really think I would be with you right now if you weren't pregnant? As soon as my son pops out, I'm getting custody and I'm tossing you out on your ass. You're just a hassle and all I want from you is that bun in the oven."

I swallowed hard, believing every word as though this was my worst nightmares come true. "Rick," I said, tears starting in my eyes.

He grinned, lifting up a newborn baby boy in his arms, telling me to, "Say goodbye." I looked down, my stomach was flat. I looked up and the room was once again blank. I twirled in panic for a moment, calling out to the empty room, searching for anyone or anything. Nothing responded. Everything just remained the same. My face continued to sting. My heart continued to race.

I heard my father's voice calling after me. "Katie? Katie, come on, sweetheart. Wake up."

The white lights turned. They faded away and I looked up into more lights, an instant pounding in my head and a raw version of my voice questioned, "Dad?"

"That's it, that's good. Stay with me Katie. Please, stay with me."

As my eyes opened, I looked out into the world. My body was moving, but not by itself. Whatever I was laying on top of, it was rocking too. So was my dad. So was the man in the black EMS uniform. "Miss, can you tell me your name?"

"What's- what's going on?"

"Just look at me," the EMT insisted. "What's your name." My eyes wandered anyway. I looked down to see blood soaking my chest. From the pain searing in my nose and cheeks, I could only guess I broke something. But that wasn't the matter I was aware of most. I could feel the baby moving about. I recognized that my shirt had been cut open and there were shock pads placed over my chest. Did I lose that much blood from my nose? With that, I tried to it up, and immediately my abdomen screamed. The baby writhed. I looked down to see that there was a special amount of blood around my hips. Just as soon as I saw this, I felt a twinge of pain in my chest. My world began to black out. the last things I heard were my father's call, and the sign of a heart monitor flat-lining.