Very random stories with Lizzie or Wanda as the main love interest, but there will be twists and turns with different cameos. 😉 🤷🏼♀️
I won't spend much time writing them out, so sorry in advance if the stories are a little all over the place. 😅...
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"First up, I wanna say we don't really need to be here," I say, looking directly at our marriage counselor.
"You didn't have to come," he replies, his gaze shifting between Wanda and me.
"Right."
"Absolutely. But we have a theory," Wanda chimes in, her voice steady and confident.
"We do?" I ask, caught off guard and curious about where she's going with this.
"The Oil-Check," Wanda responds, giving me a pointed look as if reminding me of a conversation we supposedly had.
"Right! The Oil-check," I say, quickly catching on. "See, we've been married five years..."
"Six," Wanda corrects me, her tone matter-of-fact.
"Five, six years, and this is like a checkup for us. Pop the hood, nose around, change the oil," I explain, gesturing animatedly.
"Okay. That makes sense," the counselor says with a nod. "Let's start out with an easy question. On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you as a couple?"
I'm caught off guard. Is this really an easy question?
"Eight," Wanda says immediately, her voice clear and confident.
"Wait. So like ten being perfectly happy and one being... totally, utterly miserable?" I ask, trying to clarify, but at the same time, I don't want to say anything that would upset Wanda.
"Just respond instinctively like Wanda did," the counselor advises, looking at me patiently.
"Oh, okay. Ready?" I turn to Wanda, who side-eyes me but gives a small nod.
"Ready."
"Eight," we both say simultaneously. I smile, feeling a small victory, but Wanda seems slightly annoyed.
"Great. Next question. How often do you have sex?" the counselor continues, and I freeze. I can see Wanda is also momentarily stunned. I glance at her, hoping for a cue on how to respond.
"I don't understand the question," Wanda finally replies, her voice steady but a bit guarded.
"Wait. Okay, I'm lost too. Is this a one-to-ten thing?" I ask, trying to defuse the tension.
"Right. I mean, because if it is, does 'one' equal 'not much' or is 'one' like nothing? Because strictly speaking, zero is nothing," Wanda adds, clearly trying to navigate the awkwardness.
"Exactly. Plus, if we don't know what 'one' is, what's 'ten'?" I continue, supporting Wanda's point.
"This is not a 'one to ten' scenario. Let's just come back to that. Describe how you first met," the counselor suggests, steering us away from the uncomfortable topic.
