La Grilla Series #1: Come Here

Chapter 37

#LGS1SaveFromPain #LGS1Chapter37 #LaGrilla1 #LaGrilla

***
Warning: 🚫
Depictions of trauma and intrusive thoughts

UMIIYAK na tumayo si Leo mula sa pagkakaupo sa tabi ng pinto ng office room. Tapos na ang pagbabalik-tanaw niya, pero umulit na naman ang mga alaala sa pagtakbo sa kaniyang isip! He just could not think straight anymore!

Pinaliguan niya ang sarili. Pakiramdam niya kasi, nakadikit pa rin si Melissa sa katawan niya. Kinuskos niya nang kinuskos ang balat hanggang sa mamula ito.

'Putangina mo, Melissa. Tangina mo!'

He continued scrubbing himself, especially around the waist, until it hurts his skin and left it reddish. His crying was drowned by the falling water from the shower head.

Sunod na kinusot ni Leo ang buhok niya. Then, Ava's face flashed in his mind.

He recalled how he became her best friend.

But starting tonight, not anymore.

Dumating na ang araw na kinatatakutan niya—ang malaman nito ang katotohanan.

Oo, natalo nila ni Jamer si Melissa noon. Melissa forced him to marry Ava, but they outsmarted her. Since Jamer and Ava reunited, Leo should have told her the truth already, but no. He decided to keep his past with Melissa a secret from Ava in order to keep their friendship! He had been quite selfish for that and robbed the truth from Ava, so he deserved her wrath after its revelation. But even if he knew he deserved this, it still hurt . . . It still hurt to lose a friend!

Nasabunutan ni Leo ang sarili habang patuloy na umaagos ang luha mula sa mga mata niya. Napaupo siya sa sahig at napayakap sa sarili katulad ng pagyakap niya sa kaniyang katawan noong nahuli siyang nakahubad ng asawa ni Melissa.

Patuloy ang pagbagsak ng tubig mula sa shower head sa kaniyang katawan pero tila hindi man lang nito mahugasan ang mga dumi sa kaniyang katawan na mula sa kahihiyan na kaniyang nararamdaman.

Kahit si Imee ay hindi na niya yata kayang harapin dahil alam na nito ang nakahihiya niyang nakaraan.

Wala na siyang mukhang maihaharap.

Mula sa gabing ito, alam na ni Imee na hindi talaga siya mapagkakatiwalaan. Sinira niya ang pamilya ng kaibigan niyang si Ava. And he continued to do so for three years because he was a weak, stupid, coward!

Wala na siyang mukhang maihaharap . . .

Nakita na niya ang dismaya at awa para sa kaniya sa mga mata ni Imee, sa paraan ng pagkausap nito sa kaniya.

It could have felt different if he saw acceptance and understanding in her eyes. But no!

Wala na siyang mukhang maihaharap . . .

At bakit pa niya haharapin si Imee?

Sumuko na siya, 'di ba?

Ayaw na niyang makasama si Imee! Mas gusto na niyang mapag-isa at solohin ang lahat ng sakit na kaniyang dinadala!

***
Warning: 🚫
Depictions of trauma and intrusive thoughts

THE next day, Leo's grief and self-pitying was replaced by rage. He had been going through a roller coaster of emotions since last night, ever since he began recounting all the traumatic experiences he went through.

His bedroom stopped being a safe place after he recalled that he was abused countless of times on that thing—on a bed. So, he cooped himself in the office room.

At this moment, Leo was sitting on the floor, reading from one of the folders that scattered on the floor with his back rested against the side of the sofa. He was in the middle of his attempt to go back to normal, to distraxt himself with his work as a lawyer by studying his client's documents.