Twenty-two letters to Liam

Letter sixteen (part two)

I'm currently hiding in my closet bc I'm really embarrassed. It's been seven months since I last updated lol. But, i'm currently on a two month break so I will be able to finish this story and I fully intend to. Also, I am going to edit the whole thing because most of this was written a year ago and I'm cringing reading it. Oh well.

Also, wattpad is doing this weird thing where it combines to words. Kind of likethis. I'll fix it asap, but it's a lot of work so bear with me

I'm back Li. Seriously, that whole conversation didn't make any sense. Kathy (my monitor, not my friend. They're both called Kathy) talked to doctor Davis because I told her about feeling lonely a few days ago. She took the whole thing way too serious.

Have I ever actually told you my story? Aren't you wondering what the hell I'm talking about? Maybe I should just tell you everything. I reckon this is going to be along letter.

It all started in primary school. There was this really popular girl, Talischa. She always looked perfect and I wanted to be her friend so badly. I thought I'd be popular as well if I could befriend her. I think she noticed how hard I was trying and that's probably why she didn't like me.

Anyways, this one time she beat up a boy at our school, and her very religious and strict parents didn't want a 'criminal' living in their house, so they kicked her out. She's been at boarding school since she was twelve. Her parents visit her on a daily basis. They're really rich and own a private jet, so they can afford to fly from the Netherlands to London every day.

Talischa didn't like me, but she pretended to be my friend anyway. I told her all my secrets, and she told them to everyone else. I knew she was doing this, but she was my friend and I looked up to her. I didn't see her flaws. Then she left, and I went to secondary school on my own. I didn't have any friends, but I didn't get bullied or teased either.Sometimes I overheard people gossiping about how I didn't havefriends, but I didn't really mind.

At home, there was my bigbrother. We fought a lot, but we got along really well and we had alot of fun together. There were my parents who were always there forme and I loved them. Lastly, there was Tabo, my dog and my buddy.

I was 15 when I startedmy second year on a different school. The reason I had to go to adifferent school was because we moved. I was a year older thaneveryone else, me being 15 and everyone else being 14, whichinstantly created a difference. People thought I was interested indifferent stuff because I was older. They started calling me slut orwhore or things like that. I begged my mum to let me go back to myold school, but my father was sick and we had to stay near thehospital. I was 16 when I started my third year. I was allowed todrink alcohol and smoke, so I started smoking, got my drivers licenseand ditched school every day. The situation at home drove me crazy.My mother was constantly busy caring for my father, and when mybrother had to get surgery on his back it was like I didn't evenexist. I didn't really care. I could do whatever I wanted. My parentsdidn't even care if came home drunk at night, or if I even came homefor that matter. I got involved with drugs. A friend of mine couldset me up with a dealer, but did I ever pay? No way.

I got cheated on and gotbeaten up. After that, my mum put me in rehab for two months. Ichanged during that time. I haven't really touched alcohol sincethen. When I was 17, everyone thought I was 'clean' long enough tocelebrate my birthday at home. I would have to return to the cliniconce a week to get a examination, and that was it. Everything wentreally well. I returned to school, and because it was my graduationyear, all I did was focus on my school work. Then one day, all of thesudden, my father's illness got really bad and he had to go to thehospital as soon as possible. He died two days later. My brotherdisappeared the same day. He went to the nearest bar and drank somuch he ended up in a coma. He woke up a few days later, but he hadsevere brain damage. He wasn't able to communicate properly anymoreand we fought a lot.

When all of thishappened, I was on vacation with my niece. The day I got back home,my father wasn't there and I immediately knew what was going on.

The first thing I did wascall my friend who could get me in touch with a dealer. And wellyeah, you guessed it, I got involved with drugs once again.

My mum caught me thefirst time relapsing and sent me to boarding school. I really likedthis school. I befriended a couple of girls and got good grades. Thenone day, I heard a girl from another boarding school was transferringto this one. It was Talischa.

It wasn't that bad atfirst. I didn't really care about her, but I knew she was waiting forthe right moment to 'attack' me. Then, my twitter got hacked.Everyone I knew received rude messages and Talischa saw aopportunity. She made my life a living hell. She told all my friendshow I really was and because she was already very popular, everyonebelieved her.

It hurts Liam, when yourfriends start to believe someone you've always hated. Somethingbreaks inside of you.

And now I'm at boardingschool, and I have anorexia. They weighed me. I have no clue what todo Liam.

I put the letter into awhite envelope and write down address all the fanmail gets send, nothis own address. I kind of don't want him to read this.

85 lbs, the scale said. 85.I had to pack my bags so I could go to a hospital. Did I mind? No ofcourse not. I wanted to leave. I was happy, until Kathy startedcalling people and started making arrangements. Now, I am able tostay and receive special treatment here. I couldn't leave because itwas my graduation year. Exceptions were always possible, Kathy said.

I don't know what to doanymore. I'm almost 18, I'm at boarding school, I have anorexia andmy father died. Where did everything go wrong?