I was supposed to be in Manchester for 3 days, i was asked to do a photoshoot and decided to stay with Ella Toone for the other 2 days because I don't get to see her much since leaving man united to join arsenal. Jonas wasn't too happy that I was missing training but I had injured my calf last week so I would've been in the gym anyway so he begrudgingly agreed.
The day before I was supposed to leave Manchester ella had a family emergency so I told her I would leave a day early. I decided not to tell the girls and go to the locker room just after they finished training to surprise them.
On the drive back to London I was filled with excitement. I had missed Leah a lot, even though I had only been gone for 2 days all I wanted to do was see her. We have been going out for 2 months now and i couldn't be happier. I had my doubts, like any normal person would but it seemed as though we were both on the same page and I was grateful for that.
Pulling into london Conley I was relived to see the car park still full meaning I had got here in time to see the girls before they went home. I got out of the car and made my way into the building.I said hello to sarah, the receptionist as I made my way to the locker room. Before I pushed the door open, I stopped outside it and listened to the voices inside trying to decipher who was still here. I heard Leah's voice which caused butterflies to erupt in my stomach but when I listened closer to what she was saying my heart stopped
"She doesn't suspect anything, I'm definitely going to win Katie. You better get that 50 pounds ready" she said her voice laced with amusement. I heard a sigh in response and by Katie's next comment I gathered it came from her
"I didn't think she was that gullible, you must be a good actor Leah. We said 2 months but I think she's already fallen in love with you." Katie spoke in her thick Irish accent, delivering the last line with a laugh
I was frozen on the spot and I felt my eyes burning. I felt so stupid. How could I let myself believe Leah actually liked me. It was a joke to them, i was a joke to them. I couldn't listen anymore. I felt sick. I wiped the tear I had let fall down my cheek. I turned around, my chest filling with anger and betrayal as I left the building, getting into my car. How could they do this to me, they were supposed to be my friends but clearly I fell for that lie too.
On the drive home, the tears rolled down my cheeks steadily. I didn't know what to do. I tried to come up with an idea to tell Leah I knew about the cruel bet she and Katie had made on me. I had let her into my heart and I had already started to feel myself falling for her and that made me feel so much worse knowing that my feelings weren't reciprocated at all.
Opening my front door and sitting on my sofa, I decided to just text her
To Leah
I came home early, can you come over? I need to talk to you.
From Leah
Yeah of course, I'll come now. everything okay?x
I'm not surprised she knew something was up after my text, it was unusual for me not to use kisses at the end of my messages but the thought of sending her them now made my heart ache. I didn't reply to her last text. I just waited for her to arrive. As I sat in my silent living room, thoughts were circling my head. Was i just too blindsided by my feelings for Leah that I didn't notice the signs. Maybe it was obvious she didn't feel the same and I just didn't want to accept that. Or maybe she was just so good at pretending that I couldn't see it.
I was pulled out of my thoughts by a knock at my front door. I stood up, wiping the tears that had escaped my eyes once again. It felt like I hadn't stopped crying since leaving the training ground. I slowly made my way to the door, preparing myself for whatever was going to happen next. I opened the door, revealing leah standing there with her usual smile plastered on her face, normally just seeing her would made me smile but now it just filled me with rage. How could she smile at me, knowing she is playing with my feelings.
"Hey baby, how was Manchester?" she asked, her voice soft and seemingly intrigued making my body tense. but I knew now, it was all a facade. I didn't reply. She stepped into my house trying to pull me into a hug, causing me to take a step back avoiding her. Her smile dropped. She knew something was off. I was still silent. I closed the door and she followed me to the sofa.
"Y/n you're scaring me, what's going on?" Her voice was filled with apprehension, and I could tell by the way she was fidgeting on the sofa she felt uneasy. I finally spoke, wanting to get this over with and wanting her out of my house as soon as possible.
"Maybe I should've invited Katie as well, she could've given you the 50 pounds you agreed on" I said, my voice laced with venom as I let out a laugh, even though the situation was far from amusing.
I witnessed Leah's eyes widening, but before she could speak I continued
"I stopped by the training ground earlier, I was going to surprise you, but before I could open the door to the changing room I heard you and Katie talking" I spoke, my words surprisingly calm, contrasting the storm brewing inside me.
"It wasn't what it sounded like. I promise I-" she tried, desperately but I didn't want to listen to her empty pleas
"No. No you do not get to talk right now. How could you do that to me leah. I thought you liked me. I thought what we had was real, but turns out it was a joke. A 50£ pond bet. Is that all I'm worth to you a cheap thrill. I hope you got what you wanted out of this and I hope it was worth it" I spat, I could feel tears brimming my eyes. I didn't want her to see me cry. I didn't want her to get the satisfaction that she had hurt me. But I couldn't stop the hot tears falling. I never expected this from Katie and especially not leah. I angrily wiped my eyes and stood up
"Get out. I can't even look at you. How could you think this was funny. I never expected this from you leah, you have really hurt me, I thought you were a better person, but you're clearly not." I choked out, trying to stop the tears was a loosing battle and I didn't want her to see me completely break down but I didn't know how much longer I could hold it in for. She didn't move, her blue eyes which i once got lost in, now witnessing the pain she caused me.
"Get out leah" I whispered, not trusting my voice
"I'm really sorry, can I just explain" she practically begged as she stood up, her face now leveled with my tear stained one
"You've done enough" i let out, stepping back from her once again,
She sighed, and I noticed the tears slowly making their way down her cheeks. I didn't care. She didn't care about me when she made that bet so why would she care now. I watched her back as she made her way to the door. She looked back towards me as she held the door handle, our eyes met but I quickly looked away, not having the strength to stare into the eyes of the woman who had broken my heart.
When I heard the door close I fell to the sofa. I felt broken. I felt so stupid. I could no longer hold in the sobs and they quickly escaped my mouth. Laying on the sofa in the dark sitting room is where I remained for the rest of the night, gradually encased by darkness, not having the strength to turn a light on. I wouldn't be going to training tomorrow, internally thanking myself for not telling Jonas I was coming back early.
My phone flashing with texts from who I assumed was leah was the only light in the room and I quickly got tired of the unwanted interruptions to the darkness I had submerged myself in. I turned my phone off before slipping into a restless sleep, hoping when I woke up this would all be a dream. But I knew deep down this was real and I needed to figure out how I could carry on knowing that.
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I will do part 2 if you want it. Idk if i like this but lmk what you think x
