SO AMERICAN | max verstappen

thirtyfive.

"And Max Verstappen is the winner of the 2022 Formula 1 Heineken Dutch Grand Prix! Another home race win for our Dutchman."

The moment he crossed the finish line my heart rate skyrocketed.

I guess now I had to follow through on our deal from Thursday night.

The mechanics in the Ferrari garage were celebrating all around me, Charles had landed P3. I had decided to support him today, wanting to tuck myself away in anticipation of Max's win. I'm not sure why I doubted he would win, he's won nearly every GP this season anyway.

Thankfully, I got a while before I needed to be in his driver's room, seeing as they still had to go through interviews and the podium celebration, but that didn't calm down my nerves one bit.

Without even thinking, I left the Ferrari garage to find Ella, mainly because I needed her with me if I was going to attend the podium celebration. She knew all that was going through my mind at the moment and would be able to calm me down.

Hopefully.

"So, your boy won." Ella greeted me as we met somewhere in the middle of the two garages, looping her arm through mine.

I sighed, "He's not my boy."

"He used to me." She shrugged, tugging me with her toward where everyone was gathering. "And I feel like you might want him to be again."

I didn't spare her another glance, mainly because I knew she was right and I'm not totally sure how comfortable I was with the fact at the moment.

We somehow managed to get to the barrier right as the top three drivers were parking their cars, all going over to their teams to celebrate. Charles was slow to get out of his car, but when he did, he smiled at the sight of Charlotte, Ella, and me. He went to his girlfriend first, the girl standing a few people to our right, before making his way over to us. His hug was tight and love-filled, he even playfully messed up my hair before walking off to do his interview.

I rolled my eyes at his antics, fighting to fix my hair once more. My gaze switched from him and somehow managed to land on the Dutch driver – who was already looking my way. Neither of our expressions changed upon our eyes meeting and I'm not sure how to feel about it.

In less than 30 minutes I'd be hearing him out, finally hearing the real reason why our relationship went to shit so quickly.

I'm not sure when I had zoned out, but the next thing I knew, Ella was nudging me with her elbow and looking at me expectantly, "Don't you need to go?" I furrowed my eyebrows out here, but she just gestured up toward the podium.

That's when I realized that the Dutch national anthem was playing. They'd already given out all of the trophies. How had I missed all of this?

He'd be done soon.

I told him I'd be waiting.

I turned and hugged Ella before maneuvering my way out of the crowd and toward where I remembered his driver's room to be. It didn't take me long to reach the Red Bull area and, surprisingly, no one even batted an eye. It was like they all still thought it was normal for me to be here.

My steps were quiet as I walked back to the room, my heart rate skyrocketing like it had earlier today. I knew that this would be for the best but I'm so damn anxious about it all.

I carefully reached for the door handle, my hand shaking as I did so. I've got this. Cautiously, I stepped inside, closing the door softly behind me. I'm going to be okay. Okay, fuck, I'm pacing. No, I need to sit down.

Couch.

Yes, I'll sit on the couch.

However, after sitting, my legs started bouncing and my hands started sweating. I hope I'm making the right decision.