When I was little, while I was still learning about my emotions, I came into a situation where my outside wanted to look happy, but on the inside, I wasn't. It might have just been a day of not wanting to share the swings at the playground, but you'll always look back on moments of growth like that.
"Questions are the mirrors that let us look at the answers within," Angie told me once, but she never told me what to do when you see the mirrors but are too scared to see their reflection. I'm sure she would have empowering advice to hand me if she was still here.
So I guess I must break the glass that surrounds me until I'm ready to look through it.
I've gotten used to the way I've decided to handle school. I do have friends, or acquaintances so to speak. I'm not crying in the bathroom anymore and I count that as progress. I do get weird looks sometimes, and it's obvious there's gossip about me. But I occupy myself with more important thoughts and just act like it doesn't bother me.
I lay low as I scurry past the large groups in the halls when I stumble on a piece of dry gum and fall into a wall. I'm praying no one saw that, my hands climbing up the wall to restabilize, I feel a piece of paper against my fingers.
'Cornerstone's, Who's Got Talent competition!'
'Heats start on Monday the 12th, February!'
'Sign Up Sheet: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday'
"Starts next week", "You gonna do it?"
I hear an unknown voice, bringing me to light.
"Uhm, I don't know?"
"Do you dance? You look like you'd be a good dancer."
"Uh-uh no.."
I didn't know who he was, or what his name was, but he had thick, fluffy, black hair curling before his eyes. He was a bit taller than I was and looked at me with interest with his soft light brown eyes. Why he engaged with me, I'm unsure, but if I dared to say anything else, I would apologise for quickly moving away after our dry little exchange of words.
If he was looking for someone to make friends with or just have a conversation with, then he got unlucky when scanning through the hall and choosing me to go up to. But he did unlock a core memory when trying to converse.
Angie's lullaby voice flew through my ears, bringing the best kind of butterflies fluttering in my head. She would sing this song, which she always denied was an original. But I still remember it so vividly and so angelically. I sang it to Mom once a few years back. She said, "One day you'll sing to the world and they'll listen." It was petite and simple, but perfect.
Did I really look like a dancer?
YOU ARE READING
Over The Fence
Fiksi UmumAt the age of 8 years old, she watched the person she loved most fall into the depths of death. Then she tried to fall too, but only into the depths of depression. She grew up navigating a life haunted by a shattered past. So broken, but so young an...
