Unseen

-27-

         "And what do plan on doing?" asks James later that same night.

As how it has become our routine, we lie on his bed, just talking until he falls asleep and I leave to mind my own business. I normally read a book or try to use the computer but that normally fails, so books and many of the graphic novels he has have become my companions when James is asleep. I don't go to his bedroom until he wakes up because watching him sleep is too creepy. I'm a ghost and I know I'm creepy in many ways, but watching him sleep is a whole other level of creepy and I will not cross that line.

"I will not cause her physical harm, if that's what you're worried about," I reply.

I'm still not sure how to feel about James' previous statement. I know what all I've said sounds like, and I'm touched that he cares so much about me as to try to protect me, but at the same time I'm hurt that he thinks I'm capable of such evil. I'm not like the ones that tortured me. I'm not a monster. All I want is a bit of justice, to be sure that they know what they did was horrible, and that somehow they'll try to make amends. Not to me, I'm dead. But maybe to my mother or any other kid at school. Diana has a baby now, I just hope that child will not grow into the kind of bully her mother was.

I just want my retribution. I don't want to kill them.

James looks a bit embarrassed after my snappy reply, he can't even meet my eyes. I sigh and look away, too, trying to collect my thoughts before continuing.

"I know, but—"

"But you still think me capable of it," I complete for him. "You think I'll drive Diana insane until she also kills herself so she can understand what she made me do. Isn't that your fear? Or that I'll coldheartedly kill her because as I'm not human anymore I don't have morals and I don't follow the social laws?"

I sound angrier and angrier as I continue with my rant, I can feel him stirring on the bed so I move away, leaving the mattress and walking towards the window.

"I'm a ghost, not a monster," I mumble next, feeling more hurt than I should.

"I'm not saying that, Paige! Don't say you're not human because ghost or not, you're more human than any other person I've met," he says and I don't have to look to know he's followed me and is standing behind me. "It's just that... the look in your eyes when you remembered, when you were talking about revenge..."

"I was shocked and terrified! How did you expect me to react? With smiles and say 'oh who cares, it's in the past'?" I shout, turning around to glare at him. "I remembered them and remembered how I killed myself. I'm sorry if I can't be happy about it."

"Stop twisting my words, Paige!" he shouts back, his blue eyes are hard and angry now. "You know that's not what I meant. I was just worried."

"Well excuse me if I don't know how to deal with trauma!" I raise my voice even louder, taking a threatening step towards him, but he doesn't retreat.

"Can't you stop? I'm not your enemy!" he shouts back, glaring daggers at me. Frustration wrinkles his face, there's a muscle ticking on his jaw and for a moment I get distracted. Just a second of weakness.

"Then stop acting like that! Stop treating me like I'm the biggest threat. She's a sociopath that drove me to suicide and she's out there. How many more victims are there because of her? Doesn't that worry you?" I retort, trying to make him see the real problem.

"I don't care about her or anyone else right now! I only care about you, Paige. Why don't you understand that?"

His voice, his words resonate around us, surprising me, startling me and making me take a few steps back, until my back hits the windows behind and I'm cornered. James stares at me so intently, breathing heavily. He takes another step towards me, making my heart race and my whole body shake in anticipation.