10:30pm.
Click- the light's out.
Click- here come the intrusive thoughts:
"What if they hate me?"
"Why did I say that?"
"What am I even doing with my life?"
"What is life?"
"Am I even alive?"
"Do I even care anymore?"
I stare into nothingness until
I can't take the silent darkness
Any longer.
1:30am.
Click- the light's on.
Click- the phone screen's on:
"Your new horoscope reading!
Interact 3x to claim!"
"Simple, healthy recipes in under 10 minutes!
Be sure to like and follow!"
"Which Squishmallow are you?
Pause the video to find out!"
"Police searching for Ontario offender;
Wanted on Canada-wide warrant"
"Global warming continues to wreak havoc
On Earth's Climate! Donate here!"
"Trudeau booed at during the North American
Indigenous Games- here's why"
I fall asleep still staring at the glowing headlines.
3:30am.
Click- the light's out.
Click- the phone screen's off.
I'm too exhausted to think.
I don't want to think.
It's too hot.
It's too cold.
I should drink water.
No it's fine I don't need it.
I fall asleep again- not out of
Peacefulness, but because
I give up on being comfortable
5:30am.
Click- the light's on.
Click- my back cracks.
I really am dehydrated.
I get some water.
It tastes like toothpaste.
It's fine.
I'm not going to fall asleep again anyways.
I should eat something.
No it's fine i'm not
Hungry.
6:30am.
Click- the hallway lights up.
Click- someone opens the bathroom door.
I should get up.
But i'm tired.
I didn't even rest.
I'm not too tired.
I'll be fine.
I try to get up.
I can't seem to get any rest anyways.
7:30am.
Click- my light is on.
Click- my brother is up.
I need to get up.
I need to eat.
I'm not hungry.
I drink some water.
It still tastes like toothpaste.
I slump into my blankets,
Not used to the bright sunlight
Entering my room from the windows.
10:30am.
Beep- my car alarm goes off.
Beep- it doesn't stop.
I finally get up.
What time is it?
Ugh i don't even care.
I turn off the alarm.
I go back to sleep.
The day washes away
and before I know it
it's
10:30pm again.
-❀Oleander✿
YOU ARE READING
A Manuscript From Midnight
PuisiA collection of passages (most are sad) that I've written late at night when my brain decides to go into crisis mode. Enjoy!
