Falling For The Mob

36 Project

Zoë

My phone buzzes to life, making me jolt up from my sleep. Without properly opening my eyes, I pick up and clear the sleep from my throat. "Hello?"

"Hey Zo, it's me."

The sound of Addy's voice wakes me completely, and I begin searching the room. Sam snuck out the way she has been doing all week, and even though I hate waking up to an empty space, I'm relieved. The last thing I need is a repeat of what happened last time Sam was in my bed and Addy was on the phone.

"Hey Addy, long time no speak."

My smile can be heard in my voice. It has been very hard to have conversations with her as my guilt drives me crazy, but I really have missed her.

"Tell me about it, things have been so hectic lately I haven't had the chance to check in on you. What have you been up to?"

I lay back down, resting my head on the pillow that has smelled like Sam for two weeks. The thought brings a warm wave through my body.

"I've been working a lot, I'm just happy my night shifts end in a few days, so I can get back to a normal schedule. I hate how I barely see any daylight."

I hear soft laughter at the other end.

"Well, since you have been on the night shift, and Sam has been avoiding me, I've been a bit bored. How about I come pick you up for lunch? I can be at the hospital in ten minutes."

I cringe at the mention of her name, but luckily she can't see my face.

"That actually sounds like fun, but I'm home."

"Really?"

She knows how little time I actually spend in my apartment, so I find myself telling her that my couch has been causing back problems. I figure that half a lie is not as bad. It's not like I can casually mention to her that Sam has been sleeping here. It was my choice to keep this from her, and I plan on sticking to that.

I had hoped to avoid the Sam topic completely, but Addy had other plans. For the last two hours, she has been venting non-stop about her behavior patterns of the last month.

We spoke about Sam having nightmares, but she again refuses to talk to anyone about it. I've tried getting her to open up several times these last weeks, but eventually had to give up. In even more ways, she made it clear that she does not want to share more of herself with me, and it is not my place to push.

Every second passed with Addy makes me feel a bit worse. I can see how worried she gets when Sam shuts her out completely. I know things are tough for her, but in her own way, Sam is dealing with it. She looks just a bit better every time I see her, and I want to tell Addy this, but as far as she knows, Sam and I haven't had contact since before she left.

"You know, she doesn't even sleep in her own bed. Well, I'm assuming she is sleeping. She just disappears at night and comes home a few hours later, rested."

She flops back down on the couch beside me as I try to ignore the sudden ache in my chest.

Hiding my face from her, I walk to the post and prepare the gun for another round. The movements are becoming too familiar. "Every night, you say?"

She hums absentmindedly as I keep my back towards her. Her lack of a clear answer is not helping me feel any better. "She leaves every night?" I ask again. Sam is only at my place every other night, occasionally skipping two.

"Yeah, most nights, she hasn't been sleeping in her bed since we brought her back."

My back stiffens as I fight the burning bile threatening its way to my throat. Without giving her a reaction, I put on the safety gear and begin emptying the clip. If she sees me, she'll notice the slight sting in my eyes. I need to distract myself long enough to move past this.