My Big Man Baby

Gawin

It was a long day, but finally, I ended my day around 10pm. I was about to head out to my bike when I bumped into Nanon at the lot. I smiled at him before wanting to make my way to my bike, but he stopped me.

"P... I didn't realize you and Ohm were so close. That you knew about Thanat and all."

I looked at Nanon, confused. His words did not seem malicious, but something about his tone was not right.

"We are okay. I mean, not as close as both of you."

"Really? Then how come you knew about his brother first?"

I looked at him even more confused. Then it hit me.

"Nanon, do you know what happened to his brother?"

Nanon was about to say something but faltered. He shook his head, muttering he had no idea.

"So you went all the way to his place, only to get jealous over me and left without knowing what happened to Thanat? You know what the difference was? I asked him about Thanat. Only that. Nothing else mattered. Maybe if you had done the same, you would not be here."

Nanon's face turned red, and he left, without another word. I just rubbed my eyes in fatigue and exasperation. What kind of conversation was that?!

I sighed as I went to my bike when I got a call from Ohm.

"P...the lumbar puncture results are out. The doctor is going to meet us shortly. Can you.. if it's ok.."

"I will be there shortly." And I hung up, whizzing straight to the hospital. I went to the ward and got there just in time. His parents were there too. The doctor came in and nodded at us.

"The lumbar puncture results are in. It's definitely a motor neurone disease. What Thanat specifically has is Hirayama disease, also known as monomelic amyotrophy. It's more often present in males between 15-25 years old despite being rare. It is typically marked by insidious onset of muscle atrophy of an upper limb, which plateaus after two to five years from which it neither improves nor worsens. There is no pain or sensory loss. It is not believed to be hereditary. There are treatment options, but it's a lifelong condition with pronounced weakness in his limbs. But he will live."

The silence in the room was deafening as the doctor's words sunk in. But Ohm's mom started sobbing, more out of relief than anything else. Ohm's dad just sunk into a chair too and held onto Thanat's hand firmly. I just cast a glance towards Ohm, who was just a cross between being happy and grieved by the news.

Knowing that Thanat's life is going to change quite radically was painful, but the bigger picture was, he would be alive. Definitely. He just had to work on staying alive and being strong while he can. The doctor told us to absorb the news first and that he will meet us again tomorrow morning to discuss treatment options.

Thanat was sobbing too but there was a look of relief on his face. I went over to Ohm's mom and just held onto her as she leaned into me crying. It has been a long day for everyone. Though the news wasn't exactly the cherry on top, it was still a positive one.

We stayed with Thanat till he fell asleep. Ohm told his parents to go home and rest and that he will take the night shift. They nodded, kissing him goodbye.

Ohm's dad looked at me, "Can I offer you a ride home, Gawin?"

"It's ok Sir. I brought my bike. I will go home shortly."

He nodded at me, thanking me for coming by again. I just nodded, seeing them off. I turned to look at Ohm who was on the chair and watching Thanat sleep.

I went up to him and kneeled down.

"Have you eaten, Ohm?"

"Not yet, P. Not so hungry."

"But it's still good to have something light. He's sleeping now. Let's get you something to eat and you can come back. Ok?"

Ohm looked at me for the longest bit and finally nodded. Ohm asked if we could go to the gardens for a bit for a walk before dinner. I agreed and off we went. We sat on a bench, silence engulfing us.

"You know P, earlier Nanon came by. You saw him too, asking me about what happened. But you know what's the funniest part? Till the end he didn't find out as he had let other petty thoughts take centre stage. We didn't use to be like this P. It hurts. Hurts alot."

I looked over at Ohm. I knew exactly what he was talking about. I wondered if I should tell him about the conversation earlier. But what good will it do? It will just hurt him more.

The last few days, I realized, despite the cheery exterior and fun loving Ohm we were all used to, there was this really sensitive and loving side to him. He was also deeply emotional and it showed in his love for his brother and family.

Without realizing it, I just placed my hands around Ohm. He turned to look at me and just leaned forward, just resting his forehead on my shoulder.

OK, thankfully he did not question the move though it had caught me by surprise. I didn't realize I was even capable of being so touchy towards another person.