Most days, I honestly feel like people are just my little dolls to play with. And I'm often upset when I talk on Discord and people don't reply to me as quickly as I want to give me attention. And then on Instagram, I'm actually interested in hearing what Sophia and Hajar have to say, to learn from them, but then that also makes me frustrated when I can't talk to them as quickly as I'd like (it's less bad here though, because at least here when they eventually reply, it feels more meaningful to me and I also much rather recieve long, thoughtful responses from them than just a very quick response).
I've been getting thoughts lately of creating a persona and almost catfishing & role-playing with real people as someone else in order to feel less bored and distract myself from how I've felt about myself & my life lately. I know that's not morally right. Hell, someone (Adrian) did that to me before and it sucked. But I've been genuinely entertaining the idea and having daydreams about it. Sometimes, I worry I will actually end up doing it, but hopefully now that I've written it down here, this will discourage my brain from acting just on my emotions like that, since this will be put out into the world elsewhere.
YOU ARE READING
ARE YOU HUMAN? OR AN ETHEREAL BEAUTY?
Non-FictionMy self learning journal; A place to record observations and ramblings about myself or my view of the world ❀ Expect random braindumps/vents, specific observations, and questions I ask myself. I will delete any sanist or otherwise bigoted comments B...
