I realized with time that I thought of myself as self aware only because I often know logically when something is right, even if my emotions say otherwise, but that this self awareness would fade or be less useful once I was around too many people at once and/or repressed my emotions too long. And sometimes I was right to dislike what someone did, but I told myself to stop thinking about it, because it was probably my fault they acted some way for some reason or because I know they did it for a sympathetic reason. But I never really got an answer I was satisfied with, because I didn't have written proof of my thought process and I'm kinda the type of person who thinks of more ideas as they write, which was exactly what happened once I actually wrote these interactions out. I also have a lot of thoughts at once, so I need to write them down neatly to streamline them. Writing it out helps me be more specific and I'm very detail oriented, so that helped a lot.
There was also how I enjoyed writing about and answering questions on myself, so I thought that made me reflective enough to be self aware, since I thought of myself and my life often.
I still agree with this, but I've thought of another reason too today.
I feel like I was often self aware just enough to know what emotions I needed to push down or hide from people.
YOU ARE READING
ARE YOU HUMAN? OR AN ETHEREAL BEAUTY?
NonfiksiMy self learning journal; A place to record observations and ramblings about myself or my view of the world ❀ Expect random braindumps/vents, specific observations, and questions I ask myself. I will delete any sanist or otherwise bigoted comments B...
