Babysitters

Chapter 40

MATTHEO RIDDLE

He was not listening.
He was not listening, and I felt like crying. I couldn't let my won brother do this. Rip his own soul to shreds.
I knew our father was cruel and ridiculously ambitious, but making Tom do this? I never would've thought even he'd go quite this far.
When Enzo dropped the bomb on me just a while ago, I had been able to feel my heart jump to my throat, blocking my airways. It had been hard to breathe, and I could practically feel the incoming panic attack taking over. It had felt like hours, but in reality was just a few seconds. The sight of Enzo in front of me, luckily, had helped me through those seconds and gave me a new chance at gathering myself. That had not been the time to break down, and neither was this.
I had to focus if I wanted to help my brother.
Focus, focus, focus.
"We've been planning this for months now, Mattheo," my father—oh, how I hate to say those words—snapped at me. "What in the bloody hell are you on about?"
"Tom—please, just for this once, listen to me," I tried again, looking at the older and supposedly wiser version of me with desperation. "Don't do this. Let me help you. Just don't do this."
Tom looked at me coldly. He always looked like that, his eyes had always been devoid of any warmth, but it was different now. His eyes were empty. Not one visible emotion there, no reminder he ever even was a human.
Why did he look like that?
My father laughed. The sound sent shivers up my spine, making me flinch. His laugh was cruel, like he was enjoying my desperation. He was. "You've always been the weaker son. Tom's doing what I expect of him, and what I expect from you too."
I was having trouble comprehending his words. Not because the concept was somehow hard to understand, no, but because of the situation as a whole. My head was spinning again, and I felt like throwing up. How could Tom be so... stupid? How could he just accept what our father was saying? Was he under a spell?
"You're brainless if you think I'll never make a horcrux for myself," I said after managing to push all of the thoughts in my head aside just enough to create a tinge of space to form a sentence.
Voldemort laughed again. "You foolish boy. Your time will come, trust me, but as of right now, I have to focus on your brother. I'll assist him to make the right choice."
Tom wasn't even looking at me anymore. His eyes were on our father, as if he was absorbing every word that came out of that ugly mouth. My jaw clenched.
The look on his face scared me. He looked content, enthusiastic, even. As if he couldn't wait for what was about to happen. It made me feel like I'd already lost. Like there was no way I could ever talk him out of this. Hopeless.
"Tom, ple—" My sentence was cut off by a loud bang. I jerked my head in the direction of the unexpected noise, my fists balling.
Draco had burst into the room with rage, pushing the door open with force. Soon after him followed Enzo and Theo, whose facial expressions mirrored so many emotions I could hardly recognize one. Draco, instead, wore only one clear emotion on his face. Anger. It made me wonder why, since I hadn't really noticed him and Tom having a exceptionally close relationship.
Maybe I was wrong.
I turned my head back to my father, seeing the look of surprise on his face. It was topped with a hint of frustration, but the mask that he'd let fall for a second was soon quickly pulled back as his expression turned neutral again. It was a skill he'd mastered, and then forced upon me and Tom, although my brother had always been better in hiding his emotions. A bomb could explode right next to him, and his face wouldn't even flinch.
"Ah, dear boys," my father smiled viciously. "You've come to see this wonderful happening, I assume."
Theo and Enzo had already walked up to me, but Draco stayed where he'd originally walked after almost breaking the wall by slamming the door so hard.
"Not even close," he replied, his voice so full of rage it even scared me. He was fuming, and I could not understand why.
On one hand, I was glad he took this as seriously as me, but it also worried me. If he messed up now somehow, we'd probably lose our chance to get Tom to think rationally and afterwards we'd all pay the high price of defying the Dark Lord.
Okay, that one was coming for me already, but the three friends of mine might still have the chance to avoid any further consequences.
Voldemort shot a disapproving glance at Draco, but didn't bother to say anything else to him. Instead, he turned his head and looked at me. His face was even but the tone he spoke in was colder than usually, if that was even possible. "You're a disgrace to the name of Riddle. I won't let you spread your disloyalty in your brother whose just one step closer to following my footsteps and continuing my noble work."
I sucked in a sharp breath, ready to reply, but he continued quickly and cut off my incoming words.
"I suggest you leave, now, or I'm afraid I'll have to use force. All of you—you are disposable. Even you, my son."
His words were cruel, and they cut deep like a sharp knife. I'd heard the same words from him at least a hundred times before, I should've been used to it by now.
But I wasn't.
I wished for a different family. For a different childhood. For a different future.
I knew my father meant those words, but it wasn't the thing that hurt the most. It was the fact that no matter what I told myself, how much lies I made up inside my head, I still craved his validation. And I couldn't do it, because I didn't want to be like him. I guessed that was what made me weak. Tom could do it, and he got the validation. I was just—well, a disgrace.
I released my shoulders and cleared my head by force. I couldn't drown in self pity now, I had to help my brother.
I had to focus.

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A/N:
Hello loves
I'm so sorry this chapter is coming out later than it should've, I'm so busy with school right now there's no time, and to be honest, I'm lacking motivation too.
I hope I'll get the next chapter out as soon as possible. Have an amazing week :)
Love u all x