Let the church say Amen.

20.

Kierra Valencia Sheard:

"She's safe, I am loved... I love her daddy why can't you just see that instead of past it?" I let out

He looked at me with disgust, I could never get used to the look on his face... the disappointment. "I am loved daddy isn't that what should matter? That your daughter is loved?" I ask.

"Kierra you were loved, Jordan does love you... his intentions are pure they" my dad tried to say and I ran towards him.

"Kierra... Kierra STOP!" My mother yelled

I was furious, my eyes were glassy and I was trying really hard not to cry as I pointed my finger at my father .

My mom held me, "she just keeps messing this up Karen!!" My father yelled at me.

I looked at him unbelievably, my mom tried to tighten her grip on me. I really was trying to give him a piece of my mind, he was pissing me off and I couldn't handle it anymore.

I've been told the approval that I was searching for was of my mom, and even though it was part true the approval in general was of my father I fear, he was the one even though I've disappointed I didn't want to disappoint anymore.

"He was a good man Kierra!! What more do you want!!?" My father yelled at me,

I got out of my mother's grip, looked at him unbelievably. "You love mom don't you?" I ask my dad trying to recover and calm down from my anger.

"Kierra" my mom let out trying to grab my arm.

My dad stood next to us, J Drew was on the couch grabbing his head... I just got inside the house and my dad attacked me with words as soon as I did.

"You love mom don't you daddy?" I asked again.

"This is different Kierra and you know it!" He yelled at me.

"The only difference Drew is that you got to pick that you loved me" my mom said cutting me off before I even said a word.

"Karen stay out of this" my dad ordered,

"No Drew, no... " my mother said to him as she went over to him , and my dad grabbed her hand.

"You're my wife, you're submissive to-" my dad said then my brother intervened.

"That's what we're not going to do!" He said sternly at my dad as he got up.

"Look what you're doing to our family Drew... look at what you're doing to us" my mom said to him earnestly.

I was calm... calmer but I wasn't sure about him talking to my mother the way he did.

I know their marriage is a God honoring one, where my mom has to submit to her husband who has already submitted to God, but that's what she has done all her life.

She doesn't speak when he does, she respects him everywhere she goes with or without him, she humbles herself as a married woman speaks when she was spoken to when she was with him.

And weirdly as much as I admired my parent's marriage, that wasn't the type of relationship I wanted.

I wasn't the type to submit, not to the person I'm supposed to be married to... I wanted to be myself , I wanted to be myself with the person I loved and didn't want the person I love to submit to me either.

"Let's go Kierra" my mom said looking back at me.

She moved away from my father and grabbed my hand. "Karen-" my dad let out.

"Leave mom alone dad" J Drew warned, and I just stood there trying to swallow my words.

"Kierra is the one ripping this family apart" he stated with venom in his tone,