Seasons- Golden Hours

🌻Blood is thicker than Water🌻

Eshani 

Its been a week since Agastya Vikram Singh Rajvanshi hasn't texted me about whatever we have to do next. The man is himself a bad news... I am kind of glad that I could think of anything other than being in this contract or whatever. 

I could be here for Adhira's runway and of course the success party. 

Vaidehi reached on time and joined all of us but she wasn't the highlight in the party. It was Samar who was dancing with Adhira in a slow song. It looked like a treat to everyone's eyes but only the closed ones know how intense their situation is. 

The idea of love and romance- it isn't flowers and efforts for me. 

I never let myself fell in love in my teenage. I feel too much when it comes to friendships and relationships but when you love someone- it hurts too. 

You depend on them for your needs, your grief, your happiness, your comfort. And if your love is not beautiful- it becomes a reality... a sad reality. 

I love my family- I have always loved them but sometimes I feel like maybe I have always obeyed them, instead of having my own say in it. I never let anyone else give me orders because I am afraid they would know how spineless I have always been. 

I have never been enough liberated to choose my own clothes, my own subjects, my own toys and the idea of choosing a whole person to spend a lifetime with terrifies me. 

Children of dominating people tend to become people pleasers and unintentionally choose dominating partners. 

I had multiple scenarios in my head regarding my future but none of it had an image of me taking decisions. Indecisiveness isn't my primary nature but it is shoved into my throat from such a young age that it almost feels heavy to breathe. 

A soft hand is placed on my shoulder, its Mahika. "What have you been thinking?" I smile at her, poking my elbow softly. 

"Thinking about kissing someone again." I giggle but she scrunch her eyes trying to read my face and my fake smile disappear. "I was just wondering what's next." We both quietly see Adhira and Samar dancing and then moving away from the floor. 

"What's next? For now we are here so lets not think about it." She winks at me and at her back Aarav bhai is sulking. I take out my phone and click a photograph of his. He comes to us in long strides. 

"What the fuck are you doing Eshani!" He tries to snatch the phone away from me. "You should not be clicking photos like that."

"Why not? You looked pathetic!" He lift my by the waist almost slamming me on the ground before I break into a laughter and slam the phone on his chest. 

"Mannerless." He deletes the photo from my phone. 

"It was just a photo, Aarav." Mahika revolts, crossing her arms. Aarav bhai gives her a look handing my phone back to me and his eyes still pinning at Mahika. 

"She literally tied Rakhi on my wrist and is like a sister to me." His eyes scan Mahika in a mean way. "You should stay away from personal matters." 

Mahika roll her eyes and its my first time to see her like that. She hold my hand, pulling me closer. "And she is my best friend." I shrug when Aarav bhai look away, his jaw clenched. 

Mahika walk towards Adhira, holding my hand tightly. I have never seen her frustrated over something. "Your brother is an asshole by the way." She tells Adhira. "I know." We all break into a laughter we break into a laughter when Adhira doesn't even fake being offended but I move into the flashback for sometime. 

It was Raksha Bandhan celebration going on in the school and some girls bullied me for not having a brother. Every festival my parents said that they wished they had a boy and their family feels incomplete but Aarav bhai came to pick Adhira from school that day and when he saw me crying, he let me tie Rakhi on his wrist. 

Kisne kaha tumhara koi bhai nahi... Mai hu na aaj se. Best brother ever. 

And then he winked and left with that sacred band on his wrist. 

It is so funny that sometimes some random people heal what they didn't break. Maybe that's why people choose to fall in love unlike me. 

It is like a gamble- either you are on the golden side where you find the one for you, or you are thrown in the dark side where it is scary and complicated. 

Blood is thicker than water people say. I notice my friends being funny and fighting with each other and a voice in my head tells me otherwise. 

Blood is thicker than water but if it is true than I would rather die with water running inside my veins.

I would rather be non-existent when it comes to this love thing. Basic living rights would do for now and I have to unlearn everything to be open to new things in life. 

I pick out my phone to notice if he texted me... He sent me a formal document but after that we had no contact. 

I signed it and put my number also. It shouldn't have been hard for him to provide one text like Hi or Hello? 

I forget about him and dance in the moment- Single, Alive, free. 

***

This time I wasn't drunk in the party. Adhira did a great job with her Runway and she deserved every single moment and appreciation that was finally given to her. When it comes to fashion, she is a genius. 

I heard some voices from the ground floor and walked but what I saw made me stop in the stairs only. Samar and Adhira were on a couch, he was sleeping and she was trying to wake him up. 

It felt like I shouldn't be there listening to them. She had left him despite her love so he could heal himself from his family traumas but right now she is sitting and observing him closely. 

Her eyes looks like a desert, dry and thirsty for his one view. The craving and intensity in her eyes reminded me of something. 

His eyes on me. 

He clearly told me that I am not his type but well... when you are single every handsome guy talking to you makes you feel something right? 

It's just that right?