Best Friend... or Boyfriend

Chapter 8

"Yes you can. Look at me, don't look at the ground. That's done, everything that you climbed it's all behind. Just like your life, everything that you lived it's all in the past. Now this is the scary part, you have to keep going on but now you are on your own. You know how to do it but you only need to learn how to get back and keep going to get what you want. I won't help you do so, no one else will. You need to learn how to trust yourself."

Don't mess with her. By:jessieslullaby
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Daddy,

It has been a while hasn't it, almost four years Daddy. I stopped writing because people told me it was silly. I listened to them Daddy, I'm sorry. I stopped writing, but I never forgot you. How could I? You were basically half my world, Michael the other half. People say I have gone soft, I am not soft.

Daddy, I really am sorry. I am sorry about everything. About the incident, your death, cutting Mom off, everything, I am really, really sorry.

If you were here you would tell me it wasn't my fault, I shouldn't feel sorry, but I do and I can't help it.

Michael won the away game today. The happiness reminded me of you, of your smile, how your eyes always lit up when you laughed. It's hard to forget, I wish I could so I could be happy, but Daddy, I just can't. I don't want to forget.

Have I told you?

I never said goodbye, that quote from Peter Pan was stuck in my head the entire time I was at your funeral, and every time I try to say goodbye, "Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting."

I can't say goodbye because I don't want to forget.

It's been eight years and I still miss you. I remember you everyday, because if I forget, then I would have to see your face again, and you don't visit me anymore. I can't feel your presence, and you haven't visited my dreams in a while. I wish you would, so I can see you again.

But I guess I'll have to wait to tell you everything when I see you again.

Loving and never forgetting you,

Breezy, your baby girl

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I fold the letter and stuff it into the envelope, and kiss the seal. I stuff the envelope in to the now full Ziploc bag. Standing up, I grab the bag and start walking.

I walk all the way to his grave. The headstone says, Gregory Moon, Loving father and husband 1966-2005.

"I'm sorry I haven't came in a while, I had to write another letter before I could bring them all. I felt like you deserve to get the most you can get. I used to come almost everyday and sit here and write letters to you, knowing you would never read them, I never expected you to anyway. I was just being hopeful, like always. Daddy, forgive me for the person I've become. If you don't like the person I've become, you know how to reach me, you always have, but I would really love if you came in my dreams again. You just have to tell me and I'll change, but only for you. I'm your baby girl, I'll always do what you want. Please just tell me if I make you happy with who I have become," I end my little speech, my voice getting quiet and tears slipping down my face.

And doing as I have done so many times, many years ago, I fell asleep next to Daddy, even though he was six feet under. It felt as if he was sitting right next to me, pointing out the constellations I knew by heart.

Hello my creators,

Is it weird that I am crying because of this chapter? No, okay.

I really don't want to write an author's note right now, sorry.

QotC- Do you think Bri's Dad will visit her dreams again?