Tw-emetophobia until 2nd paragraph.
Alcohol on an empty stomach is never a good idea, as I'm sat in Jessie's room I feel dizzy,sick and a strong urge to vomit I throw myself up off his bed and lung towards the door "Ellie where are you going?" Jessie quickly rises from where his sitting. "I need AIR" I annouce before tumbling into the long corridor and trying to configure myself through the maze of which is his home, Jessie follows but once I'm tumbling through the crowds of other drunken students he loses sight of me. Walking out onto the long deserted driveway into the dimly lit street I feel weak,nauseated and so damn tired. I pull out my phone,the bright blue screen practically blinding me in the dark, tracing along my contacts until I see dad's number, if I wasn't drunk and ill I would never have rationally called my dad to pick me up from Jessie's and have to try to explain all of that but... I call.
"Ellie it's late,why are you calling?" I pause for a second after hearing my dad's tired voice before slurring "Can you pick me up? I'm at Jessie's house" hesitantly. I hear a loud sigh on the other end of the phone and then my body can't keep in the alcohol anymore and I reject it all in splutters of sick on the side of the road, clumsily dropping my phone and declining the call in the process.
I pick up my now cracked phone and try to tap at the buttons "please don't be broken,please don't be broken" I hum to myself, tapping the screen the blue light comes on,thank goodness, I hold a hand to my chest in relief, some texts come through on my phone.
Jessie: where are you?
Jessie: I'm worried about you.
I sigh tiredly before shoving my phone into my pocket "AAAAHH!" I scream into the dark, when I don't eat I don't have the energy to think about the painful past,the drinking tonight,the calories in the alcohol...its given me a horrible energy that makes me feel and think about the past too much,and telling Jessie about Eli has made me feel a sense of overwhelming pain.
I sit and cry until I hear a loud horn and bright light beside me,its my dad's car and he looking quite cross in the front seat. I wipe my eyes and jump up from the damp pavement making my way to the cat and yanking open the door throwing my tired body inside.
"Ellie" my dad starts to rant about my behaviour on the drive back but I just sigh loudly "Dad don't!' I yell defiantly,the short drive is silent until we get back but i jump out the car to try and get away from dad's lecture on alcohol, "What has gotten into you?! Don't walk away from me!" Dad yells as I scurry into the house.
Once inside my phone starts ringing,Jessie's name pops up and I answer "helloooo" I laugh,Jessie replies back through the phone in a serious tone "Ellie! Where are you? Did you leave? Listen what we spoke about you need to te-" beep I hang up, I don't want to hear anymore about it,fuck eli, he already haunts my nightmares the fuck do I want to think about him more than I have to. "Ellie! Why did you ran inside before I had a chance to talk to you" I laugh at my dad and shake my head mockingly at him before heading into the kitchen, being drunk has its perks,one being I'm starving and feel less worried about calories in this moment.
I open a cupboard and pull out a pack of granola bars and lean against the counter munching on them, my dad looks at me in shock and confusion but smiles as I keep munching. "You must be starving,you didn't have breakfast, yes I noticed" he nods at me before taking a seat at the kitchen table "YES I'm starving! I'm always starving!" I laugh loudly and my dad shakes his head trying not to laugh at my drunken self "Ellie! Your mum and brother are sleeping" he covers his mouth trying not to laugh and at the mention of my brother I shove the pack of granola bars down on the side and cross my arms angrily,my whole face shifts from laughter to anger "Fuck Eli! He doesn't deserve sleep! I can't sleep because of him so why should he get to sleep!" I shout fiercely loud and my dad shakes his head in annoyance "Ellie dont swear and shout like that!" Then i notice a twinge in his eyebrows as they furrow curiously and he leans forward towards my direction "what do you mean you can't sleep because of him? I never hear music late at night..." my dad seems genuinely confused,he really has no idea,I wish it was eli playing music that kept me awake, I scoff and slap my hand in my face "GOD,DAD,you are so blind" as I go to leave the kitchen my dad gets up to stop me,muttering something I can't make out as I head towards the stairs. At the stairs I see a sleepy Eli in his pyjamas rubbing his eyes and tiptoeing down the stairs "OH NO,NO,NO,YOU CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF!" I practically scream at Eli pointing at him and stomping on the spot, I see his eyes widen at how loud I'm being and dad storms in "Welldone Ellie you've woken up the whole house no doubt!" He shakes his head before going towards Eli and placing a hand on his shoulder "she's drunk,ignore her and try to get some rest" he smiles softly at him and it makes my blood boil "Why am I being treated like the problem here!" I start tearing at my hair in frustration and my dad looks at me like im insane and Eli looks at me scared, I cant tell if he's scared of me or scared for me. "What's going on? Why are you all shouting?" I hear my mums tired voice from the top of the stairs and see her shadow approaching. "Ellie is drunk and in some sort of hissy fit" Eli mocks me, I start slapping my forehead with my hands,why are my family making me feel insane! I'm the victim in this,Eli hurt me and now I can't tolerate life without flashbacks of what he did,without worrying about whats next AHHH. As I'm slapping my head my dad comes towards me and takes my hands away from my head with force "Ellie,what is wrong with you? Why are you being like this? Please calm down!" He sounds really concerned and confused and I break down in tears, my dad gestures Eli to come over "Hold her hands so she can't hurt herself,I'm going to get her a sleeping pill so she can sleep off the Alcohol" Dad let's go and Eli scaredly grabs my hands "GET OFF OF ME!" I start kicking my brother and hear him painfully yelp before kneeling at the ground holding his stomach "Ow!" He grunts in pain and tenses his face to hide how hurt he is,maybe I should feel guilty,but I definitely don't. "Ellie! What the hell!" My mum yells as she descends the staircase and comforts my brother and my dad comes back in with a glass of water and a tablet "what happened?" "Ellie kicked me" eli whimpers and my dad gives me a disgusted look,as if im a monster. "Why would you hurt your brother? Why are you bei-" "BECAUSE HE HURT ME! HE RAPED ME! I'm not insane! I can't eat because of him,I cant sleep because I'm scared he'll come in my room,because I have nightmares of him touching me! IM NOT A MONSTER!" I frantically bawl in tears and fall to the floor unable to stop the flow,letting every pent up emotion empty my body through floods of tears.
My dad stops and his face goes blank,I can see through his eyes he is processing everything I've said and at first when he looks from me to my brother I can't tell if he believes me but when he looks towards my mum and her eyes lock in with his I can tell,he now knows. Eli's face is shocked after I say what I say, I can see fire in his eyes at first,anger. Then as dad looks at him I see Eli's eyes shift,as though he's trying to figure out what lie he might spin on this,if he can lie his way out of it, I won't let him.
YOU ARE READING
My Brother.
Short StoryChapters out at least once a week. A dark story about being abused by twin brother and escaping it. Trigger warning for abuse in this story. This was difficult to go through so please don't read this or continue to read this if it could trigger you.
