Felix POV:
I hissed at how much it was worth jeongin came into my apartment
"no,no,no,felix..."jeongin was breathing heavily
jeongin tried to take the knife but i continue
"IT'S NOT FAIR ALL YOU GUYS HAVE LOVE AND CARE WHAT ABOUT ME HUH WHAT ABOUT MY FEELINGS" i yelled holding onto the knife soon i passed out crying
────୨ৎ────
I woke up looking around and a white room did I finally die or.....never mind still alive i look at my cast and sigh
"i guess it didn't work" i look up at the ceiling and tears roll down my cheeks until hyunjin came in....
"hey felix...."he muttered i just glared at him i didn't know what to do one moment i was happy then angry or sad
"go away" i said stern.
"feli-" he tried to speak
"no go.." hyunjin left and chan came in
────୨ৎ────
"baby......what did you do..." chan muttered
as i turned to him i glare in anger
"what do you want..."
changbin spoke "felix why are you so angry.."
"leave me alone..." i shout out at them...
"baby-" chan tried to talk
"don't baby me!..." i yelled at him i knew how it hurt to be yelled at....so why did i do it...
changbin spoke "lixxie we're just trying to help you just-"
"NO! GET THE FUCK OUT" i yelled not thinking about my actions
they left the room leaving my to drown in my thoughts .
────୨ৎ────
Chan POV:
"guys let's go minho,jisung and hyunjin in my car the rest go with changbin ..."
"is he ok" jeongin said wobbly tears rolling his cheeks
"it's gonna be ok innie..." i smiled and then all of us got into the car..
────୨ৎ────
felix POV:
i soon got released from the hospital and my mental health was all over the place i was not ok i was drowning i got diagnosed with bipolar disorder why now!
i had almost every mental problem why!
i was always in my dorm curled up in my bed distressed and disheveled i looked so drained chan came to check on me so did hyunjin i didnt tell the other's and his 'kind words'
(a/n:jkjkjkmmdjdjjdm😝😝)
i was still angry at him and tired of life i wanted to cry all over again but emotions wouldn't form
i brought out a paper and wrote...
hey ...if your reading this i'm at the bridge i can't help it anymore i can't even imagine living here anymore my life is miserable and i'm gonna end it finish it all i don't want to re live on its way to much of it i can't do it anymore i need to get back to where i belong....dead please....don't force me.... to live
i overdosed on some pills and picked up my phone and earbuds i played some tv girl. i arrived to the bridge and my walking was wobbly and couldn't really see thinking about the great times with the friend group and everything i was close to jumping before a car pulled up....
hyunjin ran out and pulled me back
"it's not worth it felix..."he pulled me tight and i bury in his chest and sob....finally tears ....the feeling felt good...
"life without you wouldn't be possible....lix ..let's fight through it together and with the group you have us ok...." hyunjin spoke softly and kissed my head i blushed softly at the feeling.....
(a/n: i will focus on this book a latttt 😝😝😝🎀🎀🎀)
YOU ARE READING
"am i gone yet..."|| hyunlix angst
Romansafelix has trauma and is depressed he has anxiety and a eating disorder he is scared of going back to australia his dad s3xually assaulted him and his mother took her life he lived alone in a tiny apartment in korea it was like any korean dorm you wo...
