What Have I Gotten Myself Into?

What's a Mental Break?

Work is a little chaotic—a little more than usual—and it's not helping with my anxiety. A week ago, just when Ginni had left the apartment, the same room I was in had turned into a garbage disposal hole of a dumpster. I don't know what happened or how it happened.

"Joell, I need you over here," I go to help a customer in the customer's kitchen.

Back to what I was saying, the whole room was unrecognizable. But that was the least of my worries; I had something else more important at hand. Oh, I wish it was on hand.

After resisting the urge to wash the invitation card—well, only with soap, anyway—I left the window open when I hung it to dry, only for it to have flown down. I was squatting the other way to get a clip, so it stayed still, but it had flown from me.

And the wedding is in half a month! There is a lot to do in half a month!

Finding the card is no longer the issue since Ginni, who had forgotten something, came back and had the card flow in her direction and thought to bring it in.

The problem is that, during the travel the card had, it just so happened to have gone through so much trauma until it doesn't look a second similar to the snot and wrinkles I had left on accident, but so much worse!

. . . 

You know, I could simply just not go, yeah?. .

But, that can't work. It's not a public wedding, not just anyone is invited.

Fuckkkkkkkk. I curl myself into a squat in a corner of the customer's kitchen. Why was I invited?

"Joell?" I hear a voice close to my ear.

"Joell's not home, dear," I wave my hand behind me as if shoo-ing a fly.

"I know you not home!" The voice excitedly replies as if they've won a million dollars.

"So what, you want a cookie, bitch?" I mumble, hiding myself further into the corner with my arms around my nape.

I didn't hear anything until my ears picked up something I'll regret hearing. I turn around really fast to see everyone minding their own business, baking, decorating or doing anything that passes time for them.

I lower my eyes to see a familiar someone, "El?!" I got up faster than the flow of water, but the little guy was already hiding behind Sameral's leg, not bothering to look at me for even a second.

"I'm so sorry, EL. I'm just really tired, I'm sorry... It was a slip of a tongue-" I squat next to him, about same height, but he won't look at me. The little guy is just pouting away. The tiredness has made a wreck of my brain and the thought of sleeping on this very floor doesn't sound so bad.

Focus!

But, I don't see slender legs anymore, despite being in my view full on, nor do I see the customer's or the employees. I'm so deadpanned tired from the panic and anxiety this week I barely slept a wink. 

The card is messed up as fuck. I am not going to someone's wedding of whom I don't know, who will probably have a show worth more than gold, their appearance worth more than gold.

Oh, and by the way, he just happens to be the older brother of Aslan, the youngest child of the Pasha siblings, and is thriving on the T.V., all sorts of newspaper, the billboard and so is their sister who owns such a big company herself; Sov.

How the fuck did I get myself in this problem?

"Joell, Joellllll!" Opening my eyes from a slumber I didn't know I took, I looked around a familiar room before spotting the little boy who spit on in my face...How the fuck do I keep missing him in my line of sight?

"El!, I'm so so sorr-"

"Waaaaaa," wa?

I look to my right to find a wooden fence around that side of the bed all the way to the foot of the bed. I looked lower, onto the bed mattress, to find the source of the sound who's in a dinosaur outfit, throwing a fit for reasons-who-knows-what.

"Esden!" In seconds the cute baby, who then stops crying, was in my arms. My sleep kicked out of it's place and out of the window, faster than ever!

I look to El and he's smiling at me like he knows. "You're not mad at me?" I pout at him, shoving the baby's face in his just for him to forgive me.

"Ahem." While El laughed his little bum off, my embarrassment felt hot throughout my neck. It's probably red. "I'm sorry," I touch the tip of my ear.

I slid off the bed before freezing still. What the fuck do I do now?

I look to El for support but that little rascal ran off in seconds as if he'll get a beating himself, but he didn't miss to pull a sad drag down his eye and stick his tongue at me!

I was ready to stick my tongue out too, give him his own little medicine of rudeness but I was forced to drag it back inside when I realize the eyes on me. I look down at Esden, red faced, to see this little cutie just giggling and kicking his hands.

I smile at him, booping his cute nose, making him giggle even more. Just as I pull my finger back, his little hands, being faster, hold it back into his small embrace.

"You don't want to let go?" I snuggle my face in his stomach, making funny noises. For 5 minutes, I was standing by the bed and playing with him. When I look up, I caught eyes of brown ones.

"Ahem, Sorry for that." I walk up to him, whom had not moved even a little bit. Baby ready and up, I passed Esden to the beautiful man in front of me only to retrieve my arms back when Esden started crying.

It's been a long time since I was here, since I was with Esden but him crying when I further our distance triggers something in my brain and I'm unable to put him in anyone else's arm. I cood and minimize his crying but he kept crying, yearning his hands for something.

I looked up at Aslan once more to realize his hands are still in his pockets. Did he not get them out? "Oh, I'm so sorry, do you want to hold him?" Do you want to hold him? What the fuck, Jo, it's his son!

"Esden's still crying, why don't you feed him? He must've just woken up." He walked away. I look back to the bed I found myself waking up in, once again, only to realize something new was added; a half curb.

"Did he start sleeping in this room?" I ask while walking behind Aslan. He doesn't really bother wasting a breath on me. The moment we step down the last stair Esden was out of my arms. Aslan was close to my face but not looking at me, at Esden, as if talking to him, "They set it up when he woke up crying-" He looks up at me, his finger in Esden's tiny little hands.

"You were still sleeping. He sleeps better next to you," he mumbles the last sentence before walking into the dining hall. I was struck on his lips, frozen from him talking to me, staring into me and saying that his son sleeps better by my side.

So, when I was asleep in the guest room they set up a half of the baby's curb opposite where I was sleeping to make sure he doesn't fall but also stay close to me?

"Madam?" I look behind me to see a maid. A possible blush redden my cheeks. "Please, call me Joell." I walked ahead but she was behind me still, "my apologies, honored guests are to be called with respected names." I didn't give an hear, the embarrement is real here.

I lost track of where Aslan went but, oh well, "excuse me, where to?" I ask behind me, the maid stops with such perfect timings. "Dinner will be served during this time so we'll head to the dining room," she gives a wave of her hand ahead, as to tell me where to go, so I just went blindly.

When arriving I hear noises on one end of a wall, turning there I see someone who I've to give my deepest apology to.

Just when I was about to get the fuck out of there I was frozen once more, "Joell!"

Sov calls out. Trapping me in an embrace.