What Have I Gotten Myself Into?

What the Hell am I doing?

"Someone will be right with you. The car is open, please get yourself comfortable." I hear someone assisting Joell by the garage door before leaving her.

I can't see her or the car. I don't hear anything, either. I don't know why I'm hiding; this is my house, and there's no shame in ensuring the guest had a successful drive home.

. . . 

I pass around the hallway, nodding to housekeepers and staff as they walk past and by. 

This is ridiculous. 

"Aslan?" I heard my name just as I was ready to get out of this. I looked behind to see Joell confused, hands behind her back. The jacket given by Sov was zipped open, and the calm wind did barely anything. Her white T-shirt was really light. I dashed my hands into my suit pants.

"What is it?" Why does she suddenly look startled? 

Do I appear rude? Do I really?

. . . 

What the hell are you trying to smile for?- "Aslan?-" 

"Sorry, yes?" I ask, she looks taken aback. Before I could think where this was going, she stared with worry before fully coming out from behind the door, rubbing the back of her head while looking elsewhere.

"Do you, by any chance, know which car I'll be driven back in?" She tries to look behind her but looks too nervous to do so. By me or the car?

I look down to see my hands pointing towards her. What?

She looks at me, I could visibly see a question mark above her head by the temple. What the hell am I doing?

"I'll be the one driving you," I take the keys out of the same guy who retuned, just then as he had left, visibly confused when the keys were taken out of his hand. I look to Joell; even more confused.

We're both in the car and I'm driving in the same direction I had picked her up from. What the hell am I doing?

"Thank you." I barely hear her. She's looking down, hands between her thighs that are squeezed together. I grip on the steering wheel.

"Don't mention it," I press in-between my eyebrows. What the hell am I doing?

We sit in traffic, at a red light. My fingers tap rhythmically to the steering wheel. Joell stares outside. 

In a bit, outside my peripheral vision I see her tapping her thighs. By joke, I stop my finger. Hers stop. I double tap mine, she double taps her thigh. Oh...

"Aslan...-" I look up to see Joell staring at me, her finger pointed towards the red light. I feel my face tighten, my cheeks hurting from an unknown smile I've put on. I panic behind my eyes, removing the hand that was supporting my head; directed towards her and drove ahead. 

"Ahem." Next time I look at her, she's staring at the window ahead, Sov's jacket sleeves pawing her face in an expression I can't very much see.

. . . 

We pass by where I saw her sleeping. Stopping at a Stop Sign, I look to her. She was already staring at the pole. "I'm sorry, if you were scared." She looks at me, taking her time as she tries to understand what I meant. As she got over her shock, maybe due to my apolozise, she shook her head.

"You didn't wake up, we didn't know where you lived." I lied through my teeth at the second half.

"Nothing went wrong," she nodded...eventually her heard slowed. I don't like the express that wears on her right now. "You can go ahead and turn at the next Stop sign." She directed and I did just that. When she points to her apartment, I parallel park by the curb.

She took no time in wasting, hands gripping the handle but the door didn't open. She just waited, staring. Look at me.

And she waited. I unlocked the doors. She walks around the front of the car and leaves. 

"Joell." Why didn't she look at me. 

"Oh!" She turns around fast, "Thank you so much for the ride, sorry for the late appreciation." 

That's not what I meant.

"Joell." She finally stops. On the sidewalk. There's no way she could hear me. I walk out of the car, took the keys and locked it before walking up to her.

When I was next to her she realized something, gasping before taking off Sov's jacket and pushing it into my chest. I held the jacket and she was already walking away.

"Why are you giving me the jacket?" I tried to give it back to her but she kept dismissing. She keeps avoiding eye-contacts. 

"Uhm, uh, it's Sov's." Just then, the wind picks up, her arms buckle to her chest, I keep my eyes on her fact as best as I can, her collar cut deep, her shirt light. 

"She's got plenty, you'll get cold in this wind." I tried to give it back to her but she kept dismissing it, putting it back into my hands. 

What the hell am I doing. Leave the woman alone!

I sigh, taking off my own suit and pulling her arms through it, jumping either sides of the cloth, making sure it's fitted properly.

"That's fine. You wear it. I'm in a shirt thick enough. No worries now." I state before she argues. She just stares speechless. 

I saw so many different emotions today. . . !

"Are you sure, you could still be cold." 

"I'm fine." She finally stops. We just stood on the sidewalk like this. 

She looks at her hands, playing with her fingernails. My eyes look her up and down; her grabbing my sleeve into paws, the light blue suit matching in her white T-shirt and...weirdly enough gray sweatpants.

She looks up, blinking in an emotion I like seeing now. "What's funny?" I blink, putting my natural face back on. She buffs one cheek, looking disappointed. I turn away half way, wiping my face with on hand, the other in my pocket. Cute.

When I look back she was already so far gone; almost tripping I catch up to her, holding her arm to keep her from going further. 

She will traumatize me with these disappearances of her.

"I'm sorry..." It just came to me.

"I'm sorry." Apologizing more seriously as I remove my hand, looking down, our eyes meeting. 

"I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. It was my fault, I should've tried a different solution than have you wake up in a stranger's home. The dinner was my fault as well. It was not meant to anger you," I swallow back my pride.

"I think I believed it would have been nice...If I got to know you a little better." I could feel myself getting as red as the shade her neck has gotten. The ability to keep so still in a rest face is hard than it ever was. Very hard. And, she's not looking away either.

She nods after all that staring, smiling a little too big despite trying to control it. Cute.

"I would've liked getting to know you a little better, as well. I had fun." Her eyes looked to the side,

"thank you." She smiled at me before walking to her apartment, spriting if not walking.

I close my hand; colder than it felt when I held her arm.

On the way home, things were really peaceful. My cheeks ached from all that smiling.

I never lived the end of it from Sov.