Tenant's Secret Love

Chapter 67: See you off

After seeing Renee off, I went back into the house, finished the rest of the wine I hadn't drunk, lit a cigarette and lay on the sofa smoking heavily. But I still couldn't get the image of myself asking Renee if we were friends out of my head. I was a little surprised at why I had asked that, and what the point of it was.

I couldn't figure it out for a long time, but maybe it's just like the saying goes, "When one is about to die, one speaks kindly." Even though I didn't care what Renee thought of me, when I really had to leave, I wanted to leave a good impression on her. Even if we weren't friends, I didn't want her to think of me and associate me with words like "nasty," "shameless," and "despicable."

After washing up, I gradually woke up from the post-drinking haze, so I took advantage of my sobriety to pack my own luggage.

My luggage still contained the guitar that Brittany had given me. I found a clean rag and wiped it over and over again, so that I rubbed out the pain of love and the wounds of memories. I felt a little sad.

If only there was a love that could ignore material things and last forever, then perhaps I would have married Brittany by now. In fact, I'm not at all afraid of marriage, because I love Brittany, and it's never boring to be with the woman you truly love.

I remember, in the days after we broke up, I thought about her every minute of the day, and wanted to tell her, "Please remember that I will always be waiting for you at the end of the world." But after a month, a year, and so on, I got no response, so I began to rot my life away with beer and women, while the guitar she gave me stayed by my side, unchanged.

I put down the rag, plucked the strings of the guitar, and the sound was still clear. Then I felt as if I could hear the clear laughter of those snuggled together. Such laughter had made me happy in the past, but it also hurt me in the present. So I held the guitar tightly, tightly, thinking that in this way I would hold those joyful sounds in my hands forever.

...

A phone ringing pulled me back to reality, and the laughter and joy I had held so tightly in my hands fell through my fingers like grains of sand. I tried to catch them, but I couldn't. My heart felt a sudden sense of loss and a vague pain.

I stared at the phone in confusion for a long time before answering it. It was Natalie calling. She cut straight to the chase and asked me, "Lucas, when are you going to go back to Xuzhou?"

"Tomorrow, tomorrow morning,"

Natalie exclaimed, "That soon?"

"Yes, no ties, free to come and go." I smiled and replied.

"I still want to invite you to dinner to celebrate your departure... We have been friends for so many years, and I really don't want to let you go," Natalie said with a slight choke in her voice. I knew her choking was from the bottom of her heart. She didn't want me to leave, and I didn't want her to leave Harlan either, but this city was not for me after all. Leaving meant relief and a new beginning.

"No need to come to the ceremony, you and Harlan are both quite busy. But do remember to come to Xuzhou to visit sometime in the future..." I added after a moment's thought, "if he's still willing."

In fact, in the four days since I resigned from the company, Harlan and I have not had the slightest contact. I know that he still can't let go of that incident and is also dissatisfied with me, but I don't know how to explain it to him, because my reasons are not considered reasons in his eyes. We simply cannot look at this matter from the same perspective, which makes me feel somewhat regretful and heartbroken.

Natalie didn't say anything, and I guessed even more that Harlan was still angry at this point, and maybe would stay angry for a long time. The negative consequences of this incident were really too great.

Natalie was silent for a long time before finally saying to me, "What time is your train tomorrow? I'll take you to the station."

"You don't need to go to that trouble."

"Tomorrow is the weekend, I'm not working, it's fine."

After thinking about it, I didn't refuse again, and told Natalie the time I was leaving tomorrow morning, and also gave her my current address.

After hanging up with Natalie, packing my bags, and freshening up, I finally returned to my bedroom, lay down on the bed, and thought about calling Robben and CC to tell them I was leaving in the morning. But I gave up in the end, because I knew they would come to the station to see me off, and I didn't like the melancholy of this kind of face-to-face parting at all, so I decided to wait until I got back to Xuzhou to tell them.

I turned off the lights and, facing the darkness, I summed up my years in Suzhou. In fact, I haven't gained nothing. At least I still have a few good friends and a good boss, Mark. Unfortunately, I gave up the opportunity myself and indirectly ruined Mark's promotion opportunity. I felt a wave of guilt when I thought about it.

I also know that Harlan's biggest grudge against me is because of Mark. He has always valued Mark's kindness in recognizing his talent, and without Mark, he would not be where he is today.

But do we really have to ruin our many years of brotherly feelings over these workplace disputes?

I don't understand, and I don't have an answer. I just hope that time will make Harlan let go of his anger. One day later, he and Natalie came to visit us in Xuzhou. Then, just like before, we had a few drinks, smoked a few cigarettes, and bragged a little...

Tiredness finally set in, and in the middle of my rambling thoughts, I yawned heavily, then fell into a deep sleep, quietly passing the last night before I left.

...

Early the next morning, I moved my luggage out of the house and gave the couple who had rented the house the keys.

I looked out from the bottom of the apartment building into the morning sun. I had an appointment with Natalie that day: she was going to come and see me off at the train station. But women are naturally slow, and it was still early before it was time to get on the train. I wasn't in a hurry, so I just smoked a few cigarettes while I waited and looked around.

After a while, I finally saw Natalie's slowly approaching white Mazda 6. To my surprise, there was another person in the passenger seat: Harlan. I felt my emotions surge. Harlan had come with Natalie to see me off.

After the car came to a stop, Natalie and Harlan got out of the car from either side and came up to me.

I smiled at Harlan and said, "I didn't think you'd come!"

"If Natalie's here, I can't not be here,"

I joked, "You weren't kidnapped by Natalie, were you? You don't look very willing!"

"It's almost as if I was kidnapped," Harlan responded, but he didn't sound amused.

Natalie slapped Harlan and said, "You two have been brothers for so many years, and now you're going to part like this? Let's help Lucas load the car with his luggage, so we don't miss the train."

Harlan nodded and then, together with Natalie, put my few belongings into the car's trunk. Then they said to me, who was still standing there, "What, do you want to linger a little longer?"

I smiled, said nothing, and motioned for Harlan to get in the car. Then the three of us got in the car, and Natalie started the car and drove towards the train station.