Tenant's Secret Love

Chapter 114: Recollecting the past

It seemed that no one cared about that incident, and the whole party maintained a great atmosphere. No one drank less wine, because it was the weekend and everyone was using the party to relax.

I was the only one who didn't let loose and drink, because the bar's renovation plan had not yet been made, and I needed a clear mind to work for the bar's future.

I looked at the time and it was almost 12:30, and I really didn't have the mood to stay any longer, so I said goodbye to everyone first.

Stepping outside the hotel and breathing in the fresh air, I finally felt less depressed. I didn't know when Jack had followed me out of the hotel.

I lit a cigarette and asked him, "Why are you out here?"

"I'm going to the office later to organize a meeting with the merchants," Jack explained.

"You're working overtime on the weekend!" I sighed.

Jack laughed and said to me, "By the way, do you want my old Alto?"

"What's the price?"

"Forget it, just take it. It's not worth much anyway, but I still maintain it very well."

I said without any courtesy, "Okay, after you've settled your work, you can deliver it to where I live."

While Jack and I were talking, two men and a woman walked out of the hotel. I couldn't help but take a closer look, because the woman walking with the two men had an extremely intellectual beauty.

Jack said to me in an envious tone, "Lucas, do you know who those two men are?"

I shook my head to indicate that I didn't know, but I knew they must be successful people because the cars they got into were all luxury cars.

"They are famous in the catering industry. One is Bart, the owner of Ocean View Coffee, and the other is even more well-known. He is Paddy, the young owner of the Wally Group... They are both young entrepreneurs who have only risen to prominence in the past two years! They are probably here in Suzhou for a business meeting."

I was speechless, and a huge sense of loss arose in my heart. But I couldn't say I envied them, because everyone has their own luck and fortune. After a while, I asked Jack, "Who is that woman?"

"Bart's wife Eileen is a pretty well-known anchorwoman." He sighed again and said, "This is high society! We common people can only look up to them and envy them."

I laughed and said, "How do you know that people in high society are necessarily leading a good life? Who can guarantee that Bart and the anchorwoman are happy in their marriage?"

"That's impossible. If I could marry such a beautiful wife, I would be satisfied for the rest of my life and have no regrets!"

"When you reach that level, you may not think the same way. People are fickle, aren't they, Jack?"

Jack thought for a while and said, "Maybe, who can understand each other's world... I'm going to the company, I'll give you the car later."

I nodded, but as I watched the two men drive off in their luxury car, I couldn't help but wonder if they were really living a good life. At least I have Renee by my side, but she is so lonely.

So what should people pursue in life? And how much is material wealth worth?

I don't know! Maybe I never will! Because life is an unsolvable proposition.

...

Back at the apartment, I immersed myself in work again until it was almost evening before I finally finished the renovation plan. Then I collected information online about various decoration companies in Suzhou so that I could negotiate more efficiently tomorrow.

It was dark outside the window. I closed my laptop, leaned back in my office chair, lit a cigarette, and let my mind wander.

The smoke from my mouth filled the room, which was unlit. Once again, I felt oppressed and heavy. What had happened at the luncheon today made me realize how much I had failed over the years. I had even sunk to the point where I needed my ex-girlfriend to help me maintain my dignity. What had happened to me?

Brittany must have been disappointed in me when she left. I remember it was shortly after she went to the United States, and we hadn't broken up yet. That day, we were chatting on a voice video call when Brittany asked me if I was working hard for our future. I took out a bag of lottery tickets from the cupboard and told her that was the result of my hard work.

Brittany was furious with me that day, feeling that I was unreliable. Although we kept in touch afterwards, the frequency decreased until we broke up.

On the day we broke up, I cried my heart out while hugging a pile of lottery tickets because Brittany didn't understand me...Buying lottery tickets was not a sign of irresponsibility. It was because I loved her so much and cared about her so much that I was afraid that I would not be able to provide her with material things when she came back, and I was even more afraid that I could not marry her, so I ridiculously pinned my hopes on the lottery. I bought ten tickets every day for several months.

When I think of this, my heart aches with a sudden spasm. Who can truly understand another person's world?

So Brittany will never understand the efforts I once made for our love. Before we broke up, I even went to a bar every day after work to sing until the early morning, just to earn some extra money.

No matter how tired I was, whenever I thought of the words "Wait" written in lipstick on the car window when she left, I didn't feel tired anymore. I thought of the happiness we had imagined together, and I felt that all the waiting was worthwhile.

But now I'm really tired. It's as if I can't find the direction of my life, and I don't know what kind of love I want, or rather, I've already rejected love because I don't want to suffer that kind of heart-wrenching pain again.

That's why I wanted to marry Daphne, infatuated with the sense of security she gave me. But did I really love her? I didn't, so when Daphne and I broke up, my father didn't feel sorry for me. On the contrary, he thought I'd let Daphne slip through my fingers!

It was a great irony that left me helpless and even more painfully ironic.

Finally, the street lamp outside the window lit up in the same way as yesterday, and my emotions gradually calmed down in the darkness. But then I saw the guitar standing in the corner of the wall, with Brittany's name engraved on it... I cried, crying out of frustration.

As I sobbed, I lit another cigarette. In the thick smoke, I could see clearly into the future: even if I were to give myself wings right now, I would never be able to go to the place that Brittany and I had once imagined!

...

The honking of a car outside the window finally woke me up from my memories of the past. I looked out the window and saw Jack coming in his old Volkswagen.

I quickly wiped away the tears on my face. I could cry my heart out alone, but in front of others, I was still the same carefree Lucas who didn't care about anything. Just like before, I could instantly put on a mask with an unnecessary smile on my face to face Jack.