Mind the Gap

Chapter 36

landonorris: pls pls pls, love, pay attention to me @AnaVillanueva 🥹

Lando's POV:

Waking up the next morning, I feel a strange weight pressing down on my chest. Not the kind that comes from exhaustion or a rough race weekend, but the kind that sits heavy with uncertainty. Ana's still asleep next to me, her face half-buried in the pillow, hair spread across the sheets in that messy way I've come to love. I watch her for a few moments, my mind running through everything that's happened in the last 24 hours. I want to fix this. I need to fix this.

Last night, we talked—really talked. It wasn't the kind of talk that solves everything, but it was enough to get us through the night without completely falling apart. Ana told me she needed time, and I understood that, but I hate this space between us. I hate feeling like she's slipping away because of something I could've handled better.

I quietly slip out of bed, careful not to wake her, and head into the kitchen to make some coffee. I need a plan. Something to show Ana that I'm all in, that I'm not going to let this fall apart over some stupid photos and a miscommunication. As the coffee brews, I lean against the counter, scrolling through my phone mindlessly. Every few swipes, I find myself staring at a picture of Ana and me—one from Monaco, just a few weeks ago. We looked so happy, like nothing could shake us. But now...

The whirring sound of the espresso machine beeps, pulling me from my thoughts. I'm standing in front of it, watching as two perfect shots of espresso stream into the cups. One is pure—black, smooth, and strong—just how Ana likes it. The other has a shot of milk, my usual. It feels routine, comforting, in a way, but today, there's nothing routine about the air between us.

I head back into the bedroom. She stirs as I set the mug on the nightstand, blinking sleepily, looking up at me.

"Morning," I say softly, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Morning," she replies, her voice still thick with sleep. She reaches for the mug, wrapping her hands around it as if it's her only lifeline. "Thanks."

We sit in silence for a moment, sipping our coffee, the tension from last night still lingering in the air. I can feel it, hanging between us like a thick fog. I want to say something, but I don't want to push her. I've already pushed too much.

"I've been thinking," I finally say, breaking the silence. Ana looks up at me, her eyebrows raising slightly. "About everything. About how I handled things, about how you're feeling... and I just want you to know, I'm not going to let this slip. I'm not going to let us slip."

She takes a slow sip of her coffee, her eyes never leaving mine. I can tell she's listening, but she's guarded. "I know you don't want space, Lando," she says, her voice quieter than usual, "but I need it. To figure out if this is something I can handle."

My heart drops a little, but I nod. "I get that. But can I just say something? Before you make any decisions?"

She nods, waiting for me to continue.

"I'm not perfect, and I'll admit, I messed up. Not telling you about Savi being at the party—that was wrong. I should've been upfront with you. But I don't want you to think for a second that I'm not fully committed to you, to us. You're my person, Ana. And I hate that I made you feel like you couldn't trust me."

Ana sighs, her fingers tracing the rim of her mug. "It's not just about trust, Lando. It's about how this whole thing reflects on me. My job, my reputation. I've worked so hard to be taken seriously, and now I feel like I'm being dragged into something I didn't sign up for."

"I know," I say, my voice tight with guilt. "I understand that this relationship is different. That being with me means more public scrutiny, more... drama. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to protect you from that. I don't want you to feel like you're losing control because of me."

She stays quiet, her gaze fixed on the coffee in her hands. I hate this feeling—the not knowing, the waiting for her to decide if I'm still enough for her.

"I don't want to lose you," I continue, my voice barely above a whisper. "Not over something like this."

Ana finally looks up at me, her eyes soft but still guarded. "I don't want to lose you either, Lando. But this... this is a lot. And I need time to figure out if it's something I can handle."

I nod, swallowing the lump in my throat. "I'll give you the time you need. Just promise me you'll talk to me. We can work through this, together."

She doesn't say anything for a moment, but then she reaches out, placing her hand on top of mine. It's not much, but it's something. And right now, I'll take whatever I can get.

We sit like that for a while, not saying much, but the silence feels less heavy now. Like we're starting to understand each other again, even if it's just a little bit.

"I have a work call later," she says quietly. "But maybe after, we can take a walk or something?"

I nod, feeling a small sense of relief. "Yeah, I'd like that."

We finish our coffee in silence, but this time, it feels more comfortable. There's still a long way to go, but I'm not giving up. Not on her. Not on us.

As Ana disappears into the bathroom to get ready, I sit on the edge of the bed, my phone in my hands. I open my texts and scroll down to Mia's last message from yesterday, thanking her for letting me pick up Ana. I type a quick reply:

Lando: Thanks for helping me out last night. I think we're getting somewhere, but it's gonna take time.

I send it and set my phone down. Time. That's what it comes down to now. Time and patience. Two things I'm not great at but I have to learn. I have to.