Never ownED myself

darkness within the soul

In the midst of darkness, light persists" by Mahatma Gandhi

•» 🌸 «•« Annie »•» 🌸 «•«

The day's training was finally over. Annie ran toward Lina as fast as her tired legs allowed. She had beaten the witch—truly beaten her—and the triumph carried her forward like momentum alone could hold her upright. Lina caught her in a tight embrace, her smile reflecting Annie's relief.

"You did great. You've improved so much," Lina said, warmth steady in her voice.

Annie's eyes glistened. She was far more exhausted than she wanted to admit, muscles trembling beneath the surface of her victory. Lina kept an arm around her and murmured an incantation under her breath. Magic drifted over Annie's skin like a weightless veil, easing the strain and helping her stand.

Annie met Lina's gaze. No judgment. No pity. Her throat burned as she swallowed. She had never grown comfortable relying on others—never mind being cared for so gently. Emotion surged up too fast to contain.

After years of feeling muted and hollow, she barely had a name for this warmth spreading through her chest. Her mother's potions had stripped away so much; now the return of feeling was as sharp as it was beautiful.

"Shh... don't worry. I've got you," Lina murmured aloud. A soft pink dome flared around them, humming faintly with protective magic. She scanned Annie's body with practiced eyes.
"No healing needed today. That's good. Let's get you to the bath."

Relief washed through Annie like warm water. As grateful as she was for the healing the baths provided, she always felt a sting of guilt. Healing took a toll on the healer—bruises, headaches, sore muscles. Even with enchantments, the price was real. She hated being the reason someone paid it.

February was slipping away. She hoped to complete the final test before June as planned. She had to go to the other realm. Pretending was becoming harder each day.

"My energy though..." Annie sighed as she stepped into the bath. Heat curled around her shins, drawing tension from her bones. "I rushed to get the upper hand. Wanted to end it before it began. Still barely made it."

Hands eased into her shoulders and back, kneading sore muscles with practiced precision.

"The potions are getting more efficient," Lina said. Annie couldn't see her expression, but she heard the shift in her voice—tight, concerned. "I've reached the end of what I can do. I've put everything I know into them. I don't think we can keep this up much longer."

A knot tightened in Annie's stomach. They didn't know the full truth—not about Leah disappearing, not about the lies she'd told to protect herself. The weight of it pressed against her chest.
They were all in danger because of her.
The tracers had picked up her scent. Their last safe shop had been looted. They were getting closer.
And the worst part: it wasn't the Council. They didn't kill. Someone else had. Which meant Davon, the Wolf King, was still on the hunt.

I putting them in danger. Am I even worthy? Of course I'm not. Otherwise I wouldn't be so weak, so dependant on everyone. I lost my wolf. I lost Leah.

Lina slid an arm around her, drawing her close before the thoughts spiraled deeper. Others around the bath saw only a tender moment and felt awe. No one knew about the war inside of her but Lina.

"Shh," Lina whispered, steady as stone, trying to quiet the storm.

Leah wanted to live in the daylight, Annie thought bitterly. And I tried to hide her. Did I kill that part of me? Did I kill her with the choices I made?
Lina pressed a gentle hand to Annie's arm.