𝗗𝗘𝗦𝗜𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗛𝗘𝗥

𝘈𝘚𝘚𝘌𝘙𝘛𝘐𝘝𝘌 𝘉𝘈𝘋𝘈𝘚𝘚

RUKA

I never met a woman more infuriating than Pharita. One minute she's digging her nails in my skin and moaning my name and the next she's running away from me saying we can't see each other again.

The masochist part of me must've really loved that about her.

She was frustrating as hell but she kept me on my toes. I never knew what she was thinking or which action she would take. Everything was a mystery.

But she was worth whatever hardship
I had to face because of her. When she wasn't around, I felt the emptiness-that has surrounded me since I was kid-heavier than ever before.

She was a constant character in my dreams. In my head. In my heart.

I knew for a fact that, I was in love with her.

The feeling was stronger than anything I've ever felt before. It made me feel like I needed her to breathe.

Like I would do any-fucking-thing just to spend a second with her. I would do anything to see the glint of her brown eyes.

Anything to hear her soft voice.

Anything just to hold her all night.

Anything to make her a permanent being in my life.

It was almost too funny for me that
I never loved anyone in my life apart from my mother, but Rita captured my heart in less than a couple of weeks.

I don't know anyone alive who could withstand the temptation and manipulation and emotion I've felt with Pharita, and not fall in love her.

I went back into my apartment and shrugged on a pair of jeans, a T-shirt, and a leather jacket. I snatched my house keys and wallet off the counter before shutting the door behind me. Not even bothering to lock.

There was a million places she could be but I knew to first check her apartment. I didn't have time to waste waiting for my driver so I caught a cab and told the address to Rita's apartment to the cabbie.

While he drove I picked up my phone and dialed her number again and again but she didn't answer. Even still, I kept dialing her number and kept getting her voicemail.

I needed her to talk to me. I couldn't give up on the only woman I know I'll ever love.

I knew she loved me back. I felt it.

She might not have told me yet but I know she would. I'd make sure of it.

I wonder what in the hell made her
freak out and leave my place anyway.
I don't remember doing anything wrong. I hope I didn't hurt her in any way.

Maybe she had an epiphany and realized that she was way too good to be fucking around with a fuck up like me. I know that I'm fucked up. I don't ever do anything right but I could be a good person.

Granted, I never tried but that was only because I never loved anyone before. With Pharita as my motivation, I felt like I could do any fucking thing.

When the cab stopped short in front of her building, I tossed him some cash and raced inside her building.

Pharita still hadn't answered the phone.
I was nervous as fuck. I could easily show up to her front door and she could tell me that she didn't want to see me.

And when I refused to leave she might just call the cops. But it wouldn't be my first time behind bars.At least I had the money to make bail this time around.