MY AVERAGE LIFE

Part 74

Sharath Pov:

As Shivani teased me, playfully asking, "Oh, so now you want my cuddles? When I was trying to comfort you earlier, you were ignoring me and pushing me away. And now, all of a sudden, you want to be close, huh?"—I felt a flood of emotions I couldn't contain. Her tone was light, warm, her smile making her look so beautiful and full of life. But all I could see was the hurt in her eyes from this morning, the pain that Shreya had inflicted with her impulsive, selfish actions.

How had I let this happen? How could I let Shreya get so close, so that it even looked like a betrayal to Shivani? It haunted me all day—every time I closed my eyes, I saw Shivani's hurt expression, that vulnerable look I never wanted to put there. She trusted me, and still... I felt like I had failed her in the worst way possible.

I couldn't bear it. I wanted to hold her, to kiss her and make all of this go away, but the memory of her hurt expression felt like a barrier. I pushed myself up, trying to mask my inner turmoil. "I'll... I'll be right back," I mumbled, unable to look her in the eye as I headed to the bathroom. I could feel her confused gaze following me, but I couldn't face her right now—not with these feelings I didn't know how to fix.

In the bathroom, I gripped the sink, staring at my reflection, haunted by that single moment. Without thinking, I grabbed my toothbrush, squeezing out toothpaste as I scrubbed my teeth, almost viciously. I wanted to get rid of any trace, any memory of Shreya. The brush scraped my lips, and I barely registered the sting as they started to bleed; all I could think about was wiping this slate clean. I had to do this. I had to feel like myself again, someone worthy of Shivani's trust.

A knock at the door brought me back. "Sharath?" I heard Shivani's voice, concerned. "What are you doing? Come out," she called, but I kept brushing, ignoring her, scrubbing harder. I heard her knock again, her voice filled with worry now. "Sharath, please, open the door. What's going on?"

After a few more knocks, the door finally opened, and there she was, standing there, her eyes wide as she took in the sight of me. Her expression shifted from worry to shock. "Sharath!" she shouted, rushing toward me, her hands firm as she grabbed the toothbrush from my grip.

"What are you doing?" she demanded, anger and concern flashing in her eyes. "Are you mad? Look at your lips!" Her hands were gentle but insistent as she inspected me, and I tried to take back the toothbrush, feeling strangely empty without it.

"Shivani, let me finish," I said desperately, reaching for it. "I need to get rid of this feeling. I feel like... like I've cheated you, betrayed you. I don't deserve you, not after today. Every time I look at you, all I can see is the hurt in your eyes. How could I let this happen?" My voice cracked as I spoke, frustration spilling over.

"Sharath," she interrupted, her voice soft but strong. She tossed the toothbrush aside, taking my face in her hands and guiding me out of the bathroom. She led me to the bed, gently pushing me to sit as she perched beside me, her gaze unwavering as she studied my bruised, bloodied lips. I wanted to look away, ashamed, but her hands held me in place. She gently ran her fingers over my lips, and I felt a fresh wave of shame, reminded of Shreya's stunt and Shivani's reaction.

I flinched, pulling back. "Shivani, give me a few minutes. I'll... I just need..." I trailed off, feeling overwhelmed.

"No," she said firmly, stepping in front of me, blocking my escape. "Sharath." Her voice was warm, grounding, and without warning, she leaned closer. I tried to pull back, knowing I didn't deserve her touch, but she placed a hand on my chest, keeping me in place.

"Shivani, don't," I murmured, but she ignored me, her eyes soft and understanding as she brought her lips to mine gently, just touching my lips.

I closed my eyes, wanting to let go, but the guilt gripped me, flashing that hurt expression back in my mind. I was just about to pull away when she paused, leaving just an inch between us.

 "Sharath," she whispered, her lips brushing mine as she spoke, her voice steady and reassuring. "Look at me. Just focus on hmm" Listening to her soft voice I forced my eyes open, meeting hers. In that moment, everything seemed to still—the hurt, the guilt, the shame—all drowned out by the gentle warmth in her gaze. 

As she leaned in and kissed me again without breaking the eye contact, this time I didn't resist, getting lost in her eyes, letting myself feel her soft lips, her closeness, everything that made her Shivani. Slowly, the guilt faded, replaced by a calming warmth as I held her close, melting into the kiss.

I felt myself get lost, wanting to stay like this forever, but just as I leaned in to deepen the kiss, Shivani pulled back slightly, planting a series of gentle pecks on my lips. I let out a soft sigh, eyes closed, relishing the comfort her touch brought. I was about to pull her close again, feeling the need to kiss her properly, to make up for all the pain I'd put us through, but she stopped me, pressing a gentle finger to my lips.

"No," She stood up, leaving me confused as she disappeared into the bathroom, returning with a small tube of ointment. I watched as she sat back down beside me, dabbing the ointment carefully onto my sore lips, her touch soft and focused. Now that I wasn't lost in anger or guilt, I felt the sting, and a small hiss escaped me. She didn't say anything, just continued applying the ointment, her brow furrowed in concentration.

As she finished, I reached out, wanting to explain everything, to apologize. But she looked away, brushing me off. A flicker of panic shot through me. Did she not want to hear it? Did she hate me for what had happened? My heart tightened as I reached out, desperate to say something, anything. "Shivani... I'm sorry. I'll... I'll brush my teeth again"