The fall

Chapter 16

Penelope

Three years ago.

Down the hallway of the "Sylvan's intelligence and Evol training academy" or as I like to call it "Slave school" I was hanging out with Misha, who I was searching up and fidgeting with on her profile on my new watch I got from Mr. Laurens least year on my birthday she let me try it out by searching her up instead of anyone else.
I already knew she was pyro kinesis (Fire manipulator) but It was so much useful information, this thing is so cool—

"Hey Pen, did you hear about Blake?"
Misha speaks up and I immediately shut down the watch, her tone has a casual yet with something unreadable.
I know everything about Blake—we live together and basically have known each other our entire lives, after all after the Laurens took me in when I was an infant eighteen years ago.

I furrow my brows in mild curiosity like I totally haven't had a crush on him when I was fifteen.
"Blake? What about him?"

Misha sighs before her gazes flicks towards me before turning towards me entirely.
"He...well—broke up with his girlfriend."
The words hang in the air for a moment as I blink a few times at my shock. Well—that I didn't know.

"Wait, what? Him and Emily broke up? But I thought they were serious?"
I say that as if my heart didn't just skip a beat as the words start settling in, Blake had broken up with Emily. Blake. Single. The idea hasn't fully hit me until that moment. My mind is racing.
I look up at Misha and my thoughts swirl with hope and slight panic..

"So...does this mean..?" My voice trails off, barely above a whisper.
I look down immediately as I feel my cheeks burn in the anticipation—I am not sure what to ask..

Misha gives me a knowing look, arching an eyebrow.
"I don't know. I mean, he's free now, right? I think it's a good opportunity since you've liked him for a while now.."

I swallow hard, my throat feels suddenly dry. A chance. Do I have that? It was all I needed.
But what if he doesn't feel the same? The wave of anxiety crashes through my chest, what if after everything—years of our friendship—he rejects me?

Misha's voice breaks me through my thoughts
"You okay?"

I nod and almost give a quick, nervous laugh, but it more comes out as an awkward squeak.
"Yeah, I'm alright...Just thinking."

"Hey—you're not the type to wait around, Pen. If you want to tell him how you feel, now might be the time."

"I don't know" I murmur.
"What if he doesn't feel the same? What If I make things...weird between us?"

Misha shruggs at that.
"Or it could work out. After all who wouldn't want the "Red moon Sovereign"? You never know until you try."

My heart pounds in my chest, The chance was here—right before me. But is it really such a good idea if he just went through a breakup? He's dated around three girls this year, what If I'm just another woman he just uses to sleep with and the throws aside.
I shake my head at the thought, he isn't like that—why would I think that? I can do this, Misha is right!

...

The evening sky was painted in hues of purple and pink as Blake and I walked side by side, heading back home together as usual from the academy. It was the same day as any other yet the air felt thick with unspoken words. The tension was building between us with every step.
I had spent the entire day trying to find the right moment to confess ever since my conversation with Misha. But every time I opened my mouth, the words always died down. Goddammit Penelope Dorothea.

Blake's pace was steady, but his silence made the walk on our way home deafening. It felt as if we were waiting for something to break. He glances at me before his eyes narrow as If he's searching for something in my expression.

"Penelope" He began, his voice was soft like always when he spoke to me but it was somewhat quieter than usual.
"There's something I need to tell you. Something I should've said a long time ago.."

I feel my heart skip a beat, was he going to say what I wanted to say? The thought crossed my mind, but I definitely was getting ahead of myself.
He stops walking and turns to face me, for a moment his gaze falters. The usual serious and intense mask he wore when people were around slipping away.

"I've been an idiot," He says, as he reaches and starts rubbing the back of his neck as though he's embarrassed.
"For the longest time, I have convinced myself that I had to be with other girls—people like Emily—just to get some kind of reaction out of you. I thought If I made you jealous, maybe you'd see me differently. But I was wrong, I was the one being jealous of seeing you together with other guys.."

I blink at my surprise, my heart clenching in my chest. I'm not sure how to process.

"I thought I could convince myself I was fine," He continued as he looks at me. His gaze is honest. He means every word.
"The truth is, Penelope, you drive me crazy in the best possible way. Every time I see you, every time you laugh or smile or even look at me, I can't help myself. I've been inlove with you for years and I didn't know how to say it, so I just...I hid behind other things. I wanted you to notice me. I wanted you to feel the way I feel."

The world feels like as it's stopping, my heart is pounding in my chest. So hard as if it feels like it might burst.
I swallow hard, trying to calm myself. Before I speak in a low voice.
"You've always been with someone else. I thought you never saw me like that." My voice clearly falters and he notices immediately as he steps towards me, reaching out to gently brush a lock of my hair behind my ear.

"I know. And I'm sorry. I was trying to convince myself I was fine with it especially when I'm next to the commanding line, but I'm not. I'm not fine with this at all. I've wanted this. I've wanted you, Pen, for so long. I just couldn't bring myself to admit it.."

He looks down, his gaze now full of pain and vulnerability as he reaches and his fingers brushes gently against my cheek. My heart races once more.
"I love you, Penelope."
Before I can respond, his lips are already on mine—soft and hesitant, like he's waiting for me to push him away since this is my first kiss.
But I don't. I kiss him back.