The Email [Yandere Boss x Reader]

Chapter 42 - Edge of Control

(Hayes' POV)

I watched her walk away, her silhouette disappearing through the hallway, leaving me standing in the empty office space. 

My chest felt tight, like someone had reached inside and twisted everything until it hurt. Every fiber of me screamed to chase after her, to pull her back, to make her understand that I couldn't just stop feeling this way. 

But instead, I stayed rooted to the spot, fists clenched, the pressure building behind my eyes.

She didn't understand.

How could she?

Her words echoed in my mind, sharp and painful:

"I need space."

"I can't breathe when you're like this."

I couldn't let it go. How could I give her space when all I wanted was to be closer, to know every part of her, to make her need me as much as I needed her?

But no matter how much I tried to push it down, the jealousy, the possessiveness—it was there, festering. Every time I saw her smile at someone else, every time she spoke to another man, it ignited something dark in me.

Something I couldn't control. And now, with her asking for distance, it felt like the very thing I feared was happening. She was slipping away, bit by bit.

I couldn't lose her.

I wouldn't lose her.

I walked back into my office, the tension rolling off me in waves. My mind raced with a hundred thoughts, but they all came back to one thing: keeping her close. Keeping her mine.

I sat at my desk, staring blankly at the stack of papers in front of me, but I couldn't focus. My hands gripped the edge of the table as I replayed the argument over and over in my head. Every word she had said was like a blow to my chest.

I had never felt so out of control,

so... helpless.

The love I had for her was suffocating me, and I didn't know how to turn it off. Not when she was the air I breathed.

A thought flickered in the back of my mind, something I'd tried to ignore before but couldn't shake anymore.

I had been desperate. Desperate to make her feel the way I did. Desperate to keep her by my side, no matter what. And now, I had the means to do it.

My eyes drifted to the drawer of my desk. 

Slowly, my hand moved toward it, my heart pounding as if I were crossing some unspoken line. 

I opened the drawer, revealing a small vial. The liquid inside shimmered, nearly invisible, and yet the power it held was immense. I had gotten it weeks ago, from someone who owed me a favor. A dangerous, calculated favor that came with risks I didn't want to think about.

But I didn't care about the risks anymore.

Not when it came to her.

I had considered using it before, but I told myself it was too extreme, too unethical. But as the days passed and I watched her slip away, my resolve weakened. The idea had taken root, growing stronger until it became impossible to ignore.

The vial felt cool in my hand as I held it, turning it over. I imagined what it would be like... to see her smile at me the way I craved, to see her eyes light up with the same desperate love I felt for her. No more distance, no more fear of losing her. She'd finally be mine in every way that mattered.

I knew I should feel guilt. I did feel it, somewhere deep down. But it was drowned out by the overwhelming desire to keep her close. To protect what was mine.

It's not like I'm hurting her,

It's just a small push, a nudge in the right direction.

I stood up, the decision solidifying in my mind.

Tonight.

Tonight would be the first step toward making sure she never left me.

Later that evening, we met. The tension from earlier still hung between us, but she was trying. I could see it in the way she smiled, the forced lightness in her tone. She was giving me a chance. But the truth was, I didn't trust myself anymore. Not to be what she wanted. Not to give her space. 

Not to handle things the way a man should.

She set the table while I finished cooking, and I caught glimpses of her as she moved around the room, her presence filling the space in ways that made it impossible to look away. I loved her more than I thought I could love anyone. But that love was suffocating me, and I knew it would eventually suffocate her too. Unless I did something about it.

"Dinner smells great," she said, her voice soft and almost tentative.

"Thanks," I replied, forcing a smile that I hoped looked genuine. "I'm glad you like it."

My heart raced as I approached the stove. It was now or never. I reached for the vial, hidden in my pocket, my hand trembling ever so slightly. It wasn't much, just a few drops.

Just enough to make her feel a little more... attached.

A little more dependent on me.

As I stirred the sauce, I unscrewed the vial, letting the drops fall into the pot with barely a sound. My chest tightened, but I forced the feeling down.

This was for her.

For us.

It had to be.

I served the food, my hands steady even though my insides were a mess of nerves. She sat across from me, unaware of the silent storm brewing between us. Unaware of the decision I had just made that would change everything.

She took a bite, and I watched, my heart pounding in my chest.

The effect wouldn't be immediate. It would take time. But I would see the signs soon enough. Her lingering gaze, the way she'd start to crave my presence more. Maybe even a soft, desperate longing that mirrored my own.

"Hayes?"

Her voice pulled me from my thoughts, and I blinked, realizing I had been staring.

"You okay?" she asked, her brow furrowed slightly.

I forced another smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just... thinking."

"About?"

You.

Always you.

"Work," I lied. "Just a lot on my mind."

She nodded, taking another bite, oblivious to the truth. I could already feel my chest tightening again, but this time it wasn't from fear. It was anticipation. The waiting would be the hardest part, but soon enough, she'd start feeling it.

The need.

The pull.

And I'd be there to catch her when she finally realized how much she wanted me.

Because she would want me. I'd make sure of it.

As we ate, she laughed at something I said, her smile soft and genuine. For a moment, everything felt normal. But deep down, I knew that nothing would ever be normal again.

Not after tonight.

Not after what I had just set into motion.