bring him home (vigilante Deku & dadzawa/mic)

10: goodbye

TW: character death, hospital, morgue, nightmares, panic attacks, PTSD

*Edited 1/6/25
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Izuku stayed the night in his dorm that night, but found he was completely and totally unable to sleep.

The dark corners were too dark. The quiet was too quiet. The loneliness was completely suffocating.

He couldn't scrape the scenes that played out over the last couple of days out of his mind. The dead body of the security guard. The flames. Jumping out of the window. Thinking his teacher was dead. His mother dying. Being told he had to live with a man he'd never met.

He was saying goodbye to his mother forever in just a handful or two of hours. It was too much to bear. It was impossible to relax let alone sleep.

Plus, some of the league was still out there. He knew a few were captured on the day of the fire, but most got away. He was terrified.

Something his doctors at the mental hospital taught him was that when he felt like this, when he was spiraling, when his breath was quickening and his hands were trembling from the sheer force of his emotions, he should not be alone.

But it was so so much harder when there wasn't someone being paid to watch over you. It was so much harder to ask for help when it was 2am, everyone else was sleeping, and he didn't want to bother anyone. It was so much harder.

Despite that, he recognized that he was completely falling into panic. His entire body was trembling violently.

He quickly exited his room into the lit hallway and knocked on Todoroki's door. In the minute it took for him to answer. Izuku was hyperventilating.

He was so relieved when the door cracked open that a stray tear slipped down his cheek.

"Izuku?" Todoroki asked groggily.

"Hey, s-sorry it's so late." He stammered shakily, "I just- I-" he was struggling to even pull enough words together to explain himself, "I can't be a-alone right now."

Todoroki lost the grogginess immediately once he realized Izuku was halfway through a breakdown in front of him, "I'll stay with you." He offered immediately, his brain up with all cylinders firing, "do you want to come in?"

Izuku nodded and Todoroki pulled the door open wider, flipping on a lamp to illuminate the room a little.

"Is there anything I can do other than just be here?" Todoroki asked, watching as Izuku tried to catch his breath and stop his tears.

"I don't know, sorry. I just- I just know I shouldn't be alone." Izuku said shakily, hiccuping as he desperately tried to hold back tears.

"Can I give you a hug?" Todoroki asked.

Izuku nodded and let Todoroki wrap his strong arms around his torso and make him feel safer than he'd felt in years. He couldn't stop the tears anymore. A wave of safe relief flooded his muscles, and his shoulders finally stopped trying to reach his ears.

"Just let it all out." Todoroki whispered, rubbing circles on his back as he cried.

Izuku sobbed into his arms for a couple of minutes. By the end he felt less shaky, less emotional, and so exhausted. Sleep hadn't pulled at him like this since the anesthesia in the hospital.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Todoroki asked, pulling away from the hug and sitting on his bed, offering Izuku the space next to him by patting the comforter beside him, "You don't have to, but if it would help."

Izuku took a breath and sat down, "I have to say goodbye to my mom tomorrow." For the first time he felt sort of at peace with it. He looked up to see Todoroki looking completely heartbroken.