Multifandom X Reader Stories

"Shadows and Secrets" Raphael Santiago

Major angst!!!

The Institute is quiet tonight, a stillness settling over its vast halls. But beneath the silence, there's something heavier, something I can't shake. Isabelle's been distant recently, her once-vibrant energy dulled, her conversations growing scarce. She's my parabatai, my best friend since childhood. We're bound to each other, our hearts and minds tied in a way that only parabatai know. The thought of her slipping away without reason gnaws at me.

And then there's Raphael.

Our relationship has always been... complicated. We're not official, but there's a connection between us that goes beyond words. It's not the kind of relationship most Shadowhunters approve of—a Shadowhunter and a vampire, tangled in each other's worlds. But we're careful, choosing moments and shadows to be together, sharing glances and touches that mean more than either of us says aloud. In our own way, I thought we had something real.

But tonight, something doesn't feel right.

It's hours later, near dawn, when Isabelle stumbles back into the Institute, her steps unsteady, eyes glazed, and her face flushed. Alec is the first to notice, his brow creasing as he catches her by the arm.

"Izzy, what's going on with you?" His voice is quiet but firm, concern breaking through his usual calm.

She tries to pull away, mumbling, "I'm fine. Just... I'm fine, Alec. Don't worry."

But then I catch her scent, and my heart freezes. There's the unmistakable trace of vampire blood mingling with her own, the faint metallic undertone, the sort of thing a Shadowhunter would notice if they were close enough, like me. A sick feeling twists in my stomach, and as I pass by, I hear Alec's voice sharp and clear.

"You've been seeing Raphael, haven't you?" His words cut through the quiet, and it feels like the ground has been pulled out from under me.

My breath catches, and I stop in my tracks, gripping the wall to steady myself. Jace and Clary are nearby, their expressions mirroring Alec's, a mix of confusion and betrayal. Clary glances at me, her eyes softening as she realizes I've heard every word.

"Wait," Jace says, his voice low and disbelieving. "She's been... giving him her blood, hasn't she?"

Isabelle is silent, the guilt plain on her face, and it's all the confirmation I need. I feel like I've been punched, the air forced out of my lungs. Giving blood... receiving it... that's not just some casual exchange. It's intimate, powerful—a connection that most Shadowhunters would only share with someone they deeply trusted, maybe even loved.

The thought that Isabelle, my parabatai, could do this with Raphael makes my heart break in ways I never thought possible.

Jace's expression hardens as he looks between us. "To some people, that's as good as cheating," he murmurs.

Clary's eyes flash with anger. "(Y/N) didn't deserve this."

But I can't listen. I turn and walk out, the rage and betrayal building inside me. I don't stop until I reach Raphael's hotel, my heart pounding, my fists clenched so tightly my nails dig into my palms. I storm through the doors, my entire body buzzing with the urge to confront him.

Raphael looks up as I enter, his eyes widening when he sees the hurt and anger on my face. "(Y/N)," he begins, his voice soft, pained. "Please, let me explain."

"Explain?" I laugh bitterly, the sound foreign even to me. "How could you do this, Raphael? With her?"

His face falls, and he takes a hesitant step forward. "It wasn't like that. Isabelle... she came to me because she was struggling. I was helping her. There was nothing... nothing more to it."

"Nothing more to it?" My voice breaks, raw with emotion. "Raphael, blood-sharing isn't just some favor you do for someone. It's intimate—it's... I trusted you, Raphael. I thought what we had meant something."

"It does," he says, his voice thick with guilt. "It does mean something, (Y/N). You mean everything to me. I didn't realize—" He stops, his gaze dropping. "I didn't realize how much this would hurt you."

Tears well up in my eyes, and I hate myself for it. I never cry. I never let myself break, not in front of anyone. But this... this pain is deeper than anything I've ever felt. "Isabelle is my parabatai, Raphael. She's been with me since we were children, and you... you're the one person who made me believe that love could be real, even in this world. How could you make a choice like that without thinking of me?"

He reaches out, his hands trembling, his face filled with sorrow. "I'm so sorry, (Y/N). I swear, it was never my intention to hurt you. I was only trying to help her... she's important to you. I thought..." His voice trails off, and he shakes his head. "I was wrong. I see that now. I'll never forgive myself for hurting you like this."

I bite my lip, struggling to hold back a sob. "I wanted... I thought you were different, Raphael. That we could be different. But now, I don't know if I can ever look at you the same way."

He takes a step closer, his hand reaching for mine, though he hesitates, as if he's afraid I'll pull away. "I made a mistake. A terrible, unforgivable mistake. But please believe me, (Y/N), I love you. I don't know when it happened or how, but... you're all I think about, all I care about. Losing you... I don't know if I can bear it."

I look up at him, his face blurred through my tears, and I feel the pain radiating through my entire body. I want to forgive him, want to believe that this was nothing more than a mistake. But the betrayal is too fresh, too raw, and every time I look at him, I see the image of him and Isabelle, something I'll never be able to erase from my mind.

"Raphael," I whisper, my voice barely audible. "You were everything to me. But now... I don't know if we can ever be the same again."

His face crumples, and for the first time, I see real vulnerability in his eyes. He reaches for me, his hands trembling as he gently pulls me into his arms, holding me tightly as if he's afraid to let go.

I don't pull away, letting myself melt into his embrace just for this moment. Because despite everything, I still love him. And that's the part that hurts the most.

"Please, (Y/N)," he whispers against my hair, his voice thick with emotion. "I'll do anything to make this right. Just... don't leave me."

I close my eyes, letting the tears fall, feeling the weight of my love for him and the pain of his betrayal collide. For now, all I can do is stand here, caught between love and heartbreak, knowing that this wound will take longer to heal than any battle scar I've ever faced.