Two Versus Danger.

| The Letter |

!! Trigger Warning !! Speaks of suicide

If you are feeling like you can't cope with life anymore and went to swan dive off a school building- please don't- there are always people who are looking out for you (even when you're sleeping). I advise you to seek help as I care about you too! I wouldn't want perfect flesh going to waste ❤️

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...

It had been a while since Isabella's death; 2 weeks to be specific, but I wished those weeks never existed. I just wished that she hadn't died, and that she was still existing today. The doctors had informed my mother about her cause of death and she told me to come downstairs whenever I wanted to know... know anything, for that matter... I haven't left my bedroom for those 2 weeks. Apart from now, that is. I was in the bath; ran it myself. I hadn't spoken to any of my family members and when I did; it was usually them yelling at me from downstairs that it was dinnertime and if I'd be eating. I'd text them in response to almost everything... I didn't feel like it...

"Amber? Are you going to get out of there?" my mother knocked and called from the other side of the door, since I'd been in the bath for at least a couple hours. My knees huddled up to my chest.

I was pathetic...

The bath was cold, and usually I'd keep filling it up with more hot water, but I couldn't be bothered to each over right now. Besides that, I haven't even touched anything that Isabella had given me, and her funeral was tomorrow; didn't even have a speech planned for her yet.

"Amber," getting fed up with me ignoring everyone else, so she opened the door without another hesitation. "What are you doing?" it took me longer to come up with a response than any regular human being would've thought.

"Thinking..." I missed her. She was my life and she just... died... my mother came and crouched down next to the bath looking at me as tears threatened to come out again.

"Come on, you can't stay hidden forever. It's not healthy, and you can at least look through her stuff before her funeral; can't you?" she was right about everything, and reluctantly nodded. Getting out of the bath as she left and drying my body slowly; a small part of me could hear them from downstairs whispering that I was finally coming down- one small step to recovering. I shoved on whatever jumper and joggers I could find within my wardrobe before going downstairs; my father was in the kitchen, my sister was on the sofa along with my mother. "What do you want to open first?" it looked like a birthday celebration.

Do I want to open the one that will make me cry?

Or...

Do I want to open the one that will make me want to swan dive off a roof?

Significant decision I have. Picking the one that's closest to me, filled with her collectables and games she had... I remember how she said that when she dies, I can have her sky account; sky is a simple version of 'Sky: Children of The Light'. Isabella was always obsessed with it and we played together whenever I could. Other days she'd play by herself at 2AM; no matter the circumstance... I feel so terrible I couldn't play with her every day... and I'm still in debt to her. Not money wise, but her knowledge and time wise; how she'd spend double the time on sky just to do hers and my candle run and dailys. I won't go into those phrases and meanings, they hold too much for me...

The next bag was just her clothes that she would always be in and would tell me how comfy they were before giving them to me to try on. I end up leaving with them sometimes; secretly, I think she wanted me to take her clothes, as a way of giving more kindness and love to me. Even if she was freezing cold- and openly said it- she'd offer me her coat and jacket because I did one simple shiver. It was nothing massively special though, just some clothes that I'll wear every night- most likely.