The past hits

Nightmare

It was earlier evening when Derek finally left Meredith's house. He stood at the door for a long moment, watching Meredith as she stood in the dim light of the entryway, holding Ellie's stuffed bear in her arms.

"Thank you for today," Meredith said quietly, not looking at him directly, but her voice soft, almost hesitant. "I know it's not easy. For either of us."

Derek nodded, a faint smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "I meant what I said. I'm here whenever you need me."

"I know," Meredith replied, her eyes meeting his briefly before flicking away. She stood there for a moment longer, almost as if debating something, but then she sighed and stepped back. "Goodnight, Derek."

"Goodnight," he said, his heart a little heavier than it had been when he walked in.

-

At 1 a.m., Meredith was in the middle of a fitful sleep when the sound of Ellie's cries tore through the silence of the house. The scream was loud, heart-wrenching. Meredith's eyes snapped open, her body immediately alert.

"Mommy!" Ellie wailed from down the hall, her voice filled with terror.

Meredith's heart dropped as she quickly shoved the blankets aside and got out of bed. She moved with practiced urgency, already knowing the drill. It was the same nightmare, probably—Ellie had been having them on and off for the past few weeks. They were never consistent, but they were always frightening for the little girl. And they were always worse in the middle of the night.

Meredith hurried into Ellie's room, where the toddler was sitting up in her bed, her arms wrapped around her stuffed bear, her face red and tear-streaked. She was trembling, eyes wide in panic, still stuck in the middle of the dream.

"Ellie," Meredith whispered gently, kneeling beside the bed, brushing the girl's damp curls away from her face. "Sweetheart, it's okay. It was just a nightmare. You're safe."

Ellie gasped for air, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she continued to sob, her voice raw with fear. "Mommy... the bad man... he... he—"

"I know, baby, I know," Meredith murmured, wrapping her arms around her daughter, pulling her close. She pressed Ellie's small, trembling body to her chest, trying to soothe her. "It's okay. You're safe. Mommy's here. The bad man is gone, okay? It was just a bad dream."

Ellie clung to her, shaking uncontrollably, as if trying to convince herself that her mother was really there, that she wasn't still trapped in the nightmare. Meredith gently rocked her, murmuring soothing words into her hair. The tears eventually slowed, but Ellie's sobs didn't stop entirely, still thick with the fear that lingered from the dream.

Meredith didn't rush her. She knew Ellie needed time, needed to feel safe again before she could even think about going back to sleep. She stayed there, holding her tightly until the sobs became quiet whimpers.

When the worst of it seemed to have passed, Meredith pulled back slightly, brushing the tears from Ellie's cheeks. "Do you want to sleep with me tonight, sweetheart?" she asked softly.

Ellie sniffed and nodded, her little lip trembling. "I don't want the bad man to come back."

Meredith's heart ached at her words. She nodded, her voice firm yet gentle. "He won't, Ellie. I promise you, he won't come back. You're safe with me. Always."

Ellie didn't speak, but her small hand gripped Meredith's tightly as she nodded again, allowing her mother to pick her up. Meredith moved slowly, carefully, so she wouldn't wake her daughter further, though she knew that Ellie probably wasn't fully asleep yet.

The two of them quietly made their way down the hall to Meredith's bedroom. Ellie's tiny body was limp in Meredith's arms, the tension slowly leaving her as she settled against her mother's chest. Meredith tucked her gently into the bed beside her, making sure to pull the blankets around both of them.

Ellie curled into her, seeking comfort, her face still blotchy from crying. Meredith kept her arms around her, offering all the warmth she could. "It's okay, baby," Meredith whispered, brushing Ellie's hair back from her forehead. "You're safe. Mommy's here."

Ellie's breathing gradually slowed, and the soft sound of her little breaths filled the room. Meredith lay there, watching her daughter drift back into sleep, her own eyes heavy with exhaustion.

She stayed awake for a while longer, her mind racing. Ellie's nightmare, the fear in her voice, and the way she'd clung to her—Meredith had seen that fear before. It reminded her of everything they had gone through, of all the trauma that had been thrust into their lives without warning. And while she was determined to protect her daughter, she couldn't ignore the fact that she, too, was still broken in so many ways.

Meredith sighed deeply, glancing at the clock. It was far too late—or far too early, depending on how you looked at it. But she couldn't sleep, not when she was carrying so much on her own.

Meredith closed her eyes and held Ellie just a little tighter. For tonight, that was enough.