The past hits

Ellie

Derek sat in the living room, his hands nervously clasped together as he watched Ellie play on the floor. She was stacking colorful blocks, her concentration intense for such a little girl. The quiet hum of the house felt heavier than ever, the weight of the past two years pressing down on him with every passing second. He glanced at the clock—just a few minutes past noon—and then at Meredith, who was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, watching them both. Her arms were folded across her chest, but there was a softness to her expression now, something that hadn't been there the first time he'd walked through that door.

Ellie looked up, her small voice breaking the silence. "Derek?"

Derek's heart skipped a beat. He had only ever heard her say his name once before, and even then, it had been a hesitant whisper. But now, she said it again—more confident this time. "Derek!"

"Yeah, Ellie?" He managed to smile, keeping his voice gentle, though his heart was pounding in his chest.

Ellie picked up one of the blocks and held it out to him. "Stack!"

He couldn't help but chuckle, the sound strange to his own ears after all the heaviness in the room. "You want me to stack the blocks with you?" he asked, kneeling down to her level.

Ellie nodded eagerly, her little fingers grasping more blocks and handing them over to him. Derek carefully stacked them, mimicking her movements as best as he could. It was simple, but it was more than he'd hoped for in these first few moments with her.

Meredith, still standing at the doorway, watched them both quietly. She didn't say anything, but the sight of Derek with Ellie, building towers out of blocks, stirred something inside of her. There was a part of her that had always believed in the idea of a family, even if she couldn't fully trust the man in front of her. Even after everything. But seeing him with Ellie—seeing him try, seeing him care—it wasn't as easy to dismiss anymore.

The clock on the wall ticked steadily, the afternoon slipping away in small, fragile moments.

Ellie giggled, watching the block tower sway dangerously as Derek added another piece on top. "Wobbly!"

Derek smiled, the sound of her laughter a balm for the parts of him that had been raw for so long. "Yeah, it's a little wobbly. But that's okay," he said softly, setting the last block carefully on top. The tower teetered for a moment, then fell in a small cascade of colorful blocks.

Ellie squealed, clapping her hands together. "Again!"

Derek grinned, ruffling her curls. "Alright, let's try again." He started stacking the blocks once more, all the while acutely aware of Meredith standing in the doorway. His thoughts drifted back to their conversation earlier, to the weight of her words about trust and healing.

"You okay?" he asked quietly, looking over at Meredith. He hadn't meant to break the silence, but it seemed like now was as good a time as any.

She nodded, her arms still crossed over her chest, though her posture had relaxed slightly. "I'm fine. Just... watching."

Derek returned his focus to Ellie, his movements slower now, more deliberate. "I just want to make sure you feel like I'm not rushing this," he said, his voice carefully measured. "I know I can't just come in here and expect everything to be okay."

Meredith's gaze lingered on him for a moment, her green eyes unreadable. "It's not about rushing," she said quietly. "It's about consistency. About showing up and staying. I can't put Ellie through any more heartbreak."

"I get that," Derek said. "And I won't let you down, Meredith. I'm not going anywhere this time."

She nodded, though there was still something uncertain in her eyes. "We'll see."

Ellie tugged at his sleeve, pulling him out of his thoughts. "Again, Derek! Again!"

"Okay, okay," Derek laughed, reaching for the blocks. His smile faltered for just a moment as he caught sight of Meredith again. She was watching them both, a faint, wistful expression on her face. It was as if she wanted to believe him, but couldn't bring herself to do so completely. He understood that, even if it stung.

"Ellie's got a lot of energy," Derek said, trying to lighten the mood. "She's got her own little rhythm, doesn't she?"

Meredith's lips curved into a faint smile. "She does. She keeps me on my toes. I don't think I've had a full night of sleep since... well, since before she was born."

Derek's heart clenched at the exhaustion in her voice. "I know I haven't been here, but I want to be now. For both of you. I can't change the past, but I can promise you I'm here to stay. I'll do whatever it takes to earn your trust. And Ellie's."

Meredith's smile faded as she took a step forward, her arms still crossed protectively. "You can't just say things like that, Derek. It's not that simple. You don't know what it's been like, living with everything we've been through. Ellie's my world. If you're going to be part of it, you need to show me you're ready for the hard stuff."

"I know," Derek replied softly. "And I'm ready. I'm not asking for anything from you. I just want to be here for her... for you, if you'll let me."

Ellie, oblivious to the gravity of their conversation, clapped her hands again. "Mommy! Look! I did it!" She held up the block tower, which was, in her mind, the tallest one she had ever built.

Meredith's expression softened, her eyes following her daughter's excited gestures. "You did, sweetie. That's amazing."

Derek could feel the tension easing in the room, and for the first time, he allowed himself to hope that maybe, just maybe, things could work. He wasn't looking for perfection. He didn't even expect it. But he was willing to show up every day, to be there for Ellie, to be there for Meredith, and to prove, over time, that he was worthy of their trust.

Ellie reached for his hand, tugging on it. "Play, Derek!"

He grinned. "Okay, let's play."