- complete -
"How much of self respect do you lack to ask me to fuck you just to prove a point?"
"You are hot too." He adds like it makes a difference.
~
In a world where a writer, Hyunjin struggles with lack of inspiration for his books, so he de...
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Felix sits close to window, blanket over his shoulders, which slightly falls down when he lifts his coffee up to take a sip. Everything is covered in snow and it still won't stop snowing. Sun has come up, but there's no sight of it, hiding behind thick, grey clouds.
Just like yesterday, Felix almost feels the cold seep through his bones at the thought of going out there, but this time Hyunjin isn't here to force him to.
He feels pathetic. Maybe this is what scared him the most before getting into the relationship with Hyunjin. Being in denial for so long, pretending he doesn't care for him and being careless was so much easier. Now he sits here, sulking at the thoughts of how Hyunjin might be ashamed of him.
He never gave a fuck for such a thing. After all, he was used to being hidden away for exactly that reason. Never met any ex boyfriend's parents, friends or anyone. Back then, he believed that it didn't affect him, but with Hyunjin...
Why didn't he want him there?
And why did Felix care so much? It had never been an issue.
"Felix, why are you awake so early?" Jeongin, who peeks in the room, asks.
Felix looks down at his fingers playing with hem of a blanket, he murmurs, "I couldn't sleep."
Jeongin softly chuckles, approaching his friend. "Who are you kidding?"
Before Felix can protest anything, Jeongin carefully takes coffee from his hands, sipping on it as he flops down across Felix, grinning like he doesn't have a care in the world.
"So, what are we overthinking today?" Jeongin casually asks.
"What?! Nothing."
"Oh, come on. You have that deep in thought expression going on. So start talking before I have to ask Hyunjin, I'm sure he will know where he fucked up."
Felix cheekily smiles. "He didn't fuck up per se..."
"So it was something he did."
"I asked if I could go to the fan meeting with him, and he said it'd be better for both of us if I didn't." Felix whispers quietly as if he's admitting something and avoids eye contact like his life depends on it.
Jeongin sits there confused. "Uh, so what?"
"So what?! What do you mean so what?! Why wouldn't he want me there? Is it because of his stupid reputation?" Felix finally raises his voice.
"Are you serious right now? You think Hyunjin didn't take you because he's ashamed?" Jeongin quietly asks, that's before Felix remained silent and the realization hit him. "You can't be serious."
"Why not? They don't like me."
"And has Hyunjin ever cared?" Jeongin sighs deeply, He studies his friend for a moment, his gaze softening as he realizes just how much this is eating at Felix. "You're so in your head about this."
