Is It Enoguh?

Present's Secrets

It took me a while to write it, sorry. To compensate, I've made it very, very spicy. I hope you like it

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Vegas couldn't sleep.

Feeling Pete's breath on his neck, and his arm around his waist, he tried not to move, while in his mind, Aunt Daisy's words pounded against the walls. How much suffering had marked his life, from the time he was little until now.

His mother's suffering was a burden on his chest, she had fought for her son, and it had led to her death. Perhaps if Vegas had been stronger, if he had been better, his mother could have escaped. If he had been older, he could have helped her, he could have warned her that she was in danger. But he was just a kid, a kid who forced her to live with a child that wasn't hers, who helped his father humiliate her even more...

Vegas tried to remember how his father treated his mother, he remembered the shouting, but not the beating. When his father began to physically abuse him, Vegas was relieved that at least his mother and younger brother didn't have to suffer the beatings, only him. Now he realised that this relief was false, his mother had suffered worse beatings at the hands of his father. Tears filled Vegas's eyes, so much pain and suffering, and all because of a being who didn't deserve to be a husband or a father, he only deserved contempt and pain. Deep down, Vegas felt dirty, because for so many years, he loved his father. How could anyone normal feel love for that man? But Vegas was never normal, he stopped being normal when his mother died, and he became normal again when his Pete, his angel, came into his life.

And then there was Macau, what was he supposed to tell his brother? How was he supposed to tell him that the only mother he knew, and learned to love through Vegas, was not his mother? That his bastard of a father had taken his birth mother away from him to harm his wife? He couldn't tell him that, but he couldn't lie to his little brother either. He had to tell him the truth. If he started lying to him again, he would lose his brother, now that Macau was finally happy, now that they had a real family, a family where he could take refuge and find love, a family to trust. Vegas couldn't be the one to break that trust, this time he wasn't going to hurt the people he loved again.

Vegas felt Pete's body cling even tighter to his. It was a nice change considering where his thoughts were taking him. "What episode of the show where Vegas blames himself for something he's not guilty of are you in right now, my love?", Pete's voice sounded hoarse from sleep. He couldn't help but smile at what Pete had said, he knew him so well ... That was good, Vegas was lucky to have him. Kissing Pete's head, and hugging him, "At the part where I can think of what to say to Macau who isn't my mother's son". Pete hummed, lifted his head and kissed Vegas on the cheek, "I'm glad you're thinking about how to tell him and not how to hide it from him. I'm proud of you, Vegas, that you know how important this is to Macau too". Vegas chuckled, "Only you, my love. Only you could be proud of me for something that to others is normal. How am I lucky that you love me so much?", Pete laughed, "I know, you really are lucky to have me".

Pete moved on top of Vegas, put his arm across his chest and rested his jaw on it so he could look at Vegas, leaving his other arm around his waist. "We will talk to Macau together, if you want to. If you prefer to go it alone, no problem. Whatever you decide, I support you". Vegas brushed his hair away from Pete's forehead, "Together, it affects our family Pete, we have to do it together," the smile Pete gave him was the confirmation he needed, "We'll tell him the truth, what Aunt Daisy told us. He deserves to know". He leaned over to kiss Pete, who reciprocated delightedly.

Pete sighed, "So, I missed your self-blame session for your mother's suffering," the sadness returned to Vegas' face. "Vegas, if you keep blaming yourself for her suffering and her decisions, you'll be throwing away everything she tried to do to keep you safe. All the suffering she went through at your father's side will have been for nothing." Vegas sighed, "I know Pete. But I can't help it. I can't help thinking it was my fault."
"No. The culprits were your father and your uncle, Vegas. Don't you ever forget that. Those two are the only ones to blame. I wish your father was alive, so I could kill him myself. Now, we can only settle for seeing Korn and his whole family go down." Vegas fixed his gaze on Pete. "I don't want to lose myself again in a vendetta against my uncle, Pete. I don't want to lose you and our little boy again. But I also don't want uncle to go without the punishment he deserves."