One Night Stand || Divergent / Eric

20. Dauntless.

Rihanna - Russian Roulette 

ERIC'S POV

I have been lying awake for a while now. Sam's small body is cuddled up into my side, one of her arms is wrapped around my waist, her knee is bent and her leg is placed over the bottom of my torso and the top of my thighs. She struggled to get to sleep last night, I can understand why. I mean, she's about to be a mom to my child, and the last stage of initiation is in a few hours.

Sam is too kind for her own good.

It haunts me.

Oh how much I would love to just go into the initiate accommodation and beat Christina and Tris into next week. I'd like to kill them, brutally, in front of Sam. I want to show her that no one can mess with my girl.

I just don't know how she's done this to me. I was so sure that I didn't like her. That I couldn't ever like her. I thought that I loved my job too much, that I would always put myself first before anyone else because I am selfish. I know I'm selfish. But ever since I heard about what happened to her in the initiate bathroom... It suddenly dawned on me that I had feelings for Sam.

Feelings.

A few weeks ago, I only had a few feelings, anger, irritation and boredom. It's always the same shit here at dauntless. It's so straightforward and boring. But this year, everything changed.

For the first time since I transferred from Erudite 7 years ago, I've felt something for another person that isn't hatred, instead, I've felt passion, love and lust.

Sam has opened my eyes and my mind, she has reminded me as to what it used to be like.

What I used to be like.

I used to care, and for a long, long time I didn't. I didn't care about hurting anyone else, I could only care about myself because I am untouchable.

I was untouchable. Until Sam touched my heart.

I wonder what it's like out beyond the wall. I wonder if there's more freedom and less authority.

I wonder if it's better.

"You're thinking out loud." I heard her small sleepy voice point out, almost making me jump out of my skin. Almost.

"What do you mean?" I asked, my eyes trailing over her body that curled further into me, if that was even possible. She tilted her head back and her large green eyes met mine.

"You're not asleep, so you must be thinking. If you're not leading, drinking or fucking then you're sleeping. And you're doing none of those things, so what's on your mind Eric?" She asked, I smirked at how smart she was. She could be classed as Erudite if she's not careful.

People will think she's divergent.

"Eric," she whined, snapping me out of my thoughts. I coughed awkwardly.

"Sorry, I, uh, I'm thinking about what it's like beyond the wall." I told her, I kind of feel like she's hiding something from me. But I don't know what.

"It's completely opposite to this." She answered, "I remember what it's like now. Here you have patrols to stop the factionless from killing each other, where as out there, there are patrols to make sure the creatures don't come near the city."

I couldn't help raising an eyebrow.

"Creatures?" I questioned.

"Monsters. Not everyone survived the war, but we did, and now we have to be protected from these things. I always used to think they were a myth, to keep us out of the woods at night, but Jack and I-" she cut her self off as she felt my body stiffen at the mention of his name.