Keep holding on darling (ETF and FIR fanfic)

Chapter 32

(When Ryan ran off the bus)
Ryan's P.O.V.
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I ran off the bus and into the bathroom. I'm such a mess up. I seriously mess up everything and I'm heartless and alcohol just gets the best of me. I hate myself. I grabbed a bottle of liquor out of the cooler on the bus and went into the bathroom and got a bottle of aspirin. I dumped the remains of the bottle into my hand and popped them into my mouth. I downed some liquor so all of the pills would go down. I felt so good right now. I could feel my body go numb. The corners of my eyes turned dark and then I collapsed. Sweet dreams...

(Present)
Jacky's P.O.V.
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I called 911 and lifted up Ryan's head. I  shoved my fingers into the back of his throat. He vomited all over the bus bathroom. "Damn it Ryan don't fucking  die!" I cried out. I looked around the bathroom and saw a spilled liquor bottle and an empty bottle of pills on the floor. I couldn't help the tears from pouring down my face. Why would he ever do this. Doesn't he know how much everyone needs him. I need him..

The paramedics came onto the bus and lifted Ryan out and onto a stretcher. "Please can I ride with him I'm his friend." I pleaded. The paramedic nodded and I hopped in.

I looked at his body. He looked so lifeless. Why would he do this? That question kept running in my mind over and over again like a broken record. It screeched in my head. I looked at his hand, he looked pale and almost drained? Drained of happiness and life. He looked so sickly. I lifted my hand a little bit then put it back down. Don't hold his hand, that's weird. What if he wakes up? Screw it. I need to have him in my hands. I reached my hand to his almost too fast. The paramedic shot me a shocked look. Not that I'm holding his hand but that I just randomly grabbed his hand and so fast. His hand was so cold I almost dropped his hand but I gripped tighter into his hand and tried my hardest not to cry even more. "You fucking idiot..." I whispered under my breath.

We finally got to the hospital and they rushed him into the hospital. "Sir we will be right out to give you details" one of the nurses pushed me out of the door and into the waiting room. This is killing me. I feel so lonely now. I know he's not dead but I want to hold him right now. Oh shit! I've got to call the guys! I pulled out my phone and called Derek first.

"Dude where the fuck are you and Ryan!" Derek yelled into the phone the second I called.

"Why did you wait for me to call you if you are so worried?!" I felt a little betrayed. What the fuck Jacky this is no time to be selfish, Ryan just tried killing himself.

"Never mind just get to the hospital now and bring the guys." I hung up.

I really hope Ryan will be okay. I tried to get him to puke it all up. Maybe he didn't take that much? I don't know. I'm an idiot. I just hope he is okay.

The guys, Kat, Abbie, Brittney, and Allie finally got here and they each gave me a hug. "So what happened?" Kat said trying to choke back tears.

"I don't know. I guess Ryan tried overdosing with aspirin and liquor.." I looked down. If I looked up so see everyone's faces I would for sure break down.

The nurse came out and called us over and told us Ryan was going to be fine but he needed to stay in the hospital for another day or two. "Okay thank you so much." I shook her hand and she pulled me in for a hug. Alright I guess she could see me shaking and crying. I couldn't help it. I was so worried about Ryan.

Brittney's P.O.V.
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"I wonder what happened to Ryan and Jacky.." Allie looked around. "I don't know but if Ryan will let anyone talk to him when he's upset, it's jacky." Ron piped up. "Yeah but maybe we should go check on them it's been awhile" Kat looked around the room as if waiting for approval. I really hope everything is okay...

We all got up and went into the bus. "Guys...guys? Guys?" Ronnie yelled. We checked all the bunks, Ronnie's back room, the bathroom, everything. They were gone. "Where the hell could they be?" Kat threw a pillow on the ground in frustration. Ronnie picked it up and put it back on his bed and fake glared at her. We all said a resounding I don't know.

Derek got a call from jacky and said we needed to get to the hospital. Oh no. I hope Ryan is ok! He probably hurt himself! This is all my fault! I love Ryan why would he do this!!
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Guys my sister is officially married now and she is on her honeymoon and I miss her and my brother in law being here! They were mean to me sometimes but I still love and miss them rn! But my guy friend got me a dog tag at warped tour that says Braden and Emma Warped Tour 2015 because I couldn't go and he is just such a sweet guy! Anyways enough of me ranting I know you guys probably don't care but hopefully you liked this chapter! Rate and comment! I think this is the longest chapter I've done tbh haha