The Sound of Waves (Book #3 - Liam Payne Trilogy)

Chapter 18

CHAPTER 18

"He-he kissed you?" Liam asked. I could see his emotions fighting him from inside. "I-I think so," I said, turning to him. Rage, jealousy, anger, shock and regret filled his eyes all at once and I began to worry. "Liam," I said quietly. He blinked at me blankly a few times. "Liam please," I said. "Brooklyn-n-n!" The guy named Dylan appeared at my side and shouted my name. Liam backed away and I made the fatal mistake of drawing my attention to the blonde haired guy in front of me. He threw his arms around me and hugged me tightly. I lost Liam in the motion and when I spotted him again, he was making his way through the crowd of my family. I broke away from this Dylan guy and began pushing through the people who had gathered to see the surprise. "Brooklyn?" I heard a male voice call after me. But I wasn't listening. "Liam!" I yelled, hoping he would turn around. When he didn't, I just sprinted faster. "Liam!" I shouted even louder, yet with his hands in his pockets and his shoulders hunched, for some reason, something clicked and I knew he wasn't going to turn around. I ran as fast as I could and stumbled only slightly right before grabbing his arm. I spun him around but he was quick to sneer, "Let me go," as I caught my breath. "Liam, wait!" I said, taking deep breaths. He clenched his jaw, shoved his hands further into his pockets and looked at me dreadfully. "Why did you leave?" I asked. He stayed quiet. "Liam! I'm sorry that I kissed him, but you have to realize I don't remember it!" "What good is that going to do? Stop using that as an excuse, Brooklyn!" I had a feeling Liam was just about ready to burst, and this was the lead up. "You don't remember anything! .Yet it's like you chose the stuff you want to remember! I'm sick and tired of this! I'm sick of loving you and you not loving me back! I'm sick of pretending this doesn't kill me inside! Most of all I'm sick of giving you everything, telling you everything and letting you into my life where I've never let people in before just to have you shut yourself out from me!" I stared at him blankly. I had no idea he felt this way. "You're driving me mad! I don't know what's okay to say to you anymore! I don't even know if anything with you is okay anymore! When I look into your eyes, I see someone else! When I hold your hand, it doesn't fit properly anymore! When we kiss I don't feel anything anymore! Brooklyn, I don't know what happened! But everything we had, was lost with your memory." He paused and all I could do was stare at him, awestruck. "I-I thought I saw the old you coming back," he said, this time lowering his voice, "With the walks on the beach, the remembering, your real smile... But I guess I was wrong." Liam shocked me even more as he began to turn away from me. "Liam!" My voice cracked, but he just stopped moving. "I'm sorry," I whispered through a strained voice, "Please don't leave... You're the only person who-who understands me... You see things about me that no one else does. I need you." "You don't need me," he said stiffly with his back still to me, "And from the looks of it, I don't understand you any more than anyone else. You're right about one thing Brooklyn. I do see things about you that no one else does, but it just so happens that those things are what's making me do this." "Do what?" I asked as a tear rolled down my cheek. I was staring at his back, unable to break my stare hoping he would turn around. But all I saw was his shoulders push back, his diaphragm fall and rise and the faint sound of a deep breath reached my ears. "I'll see you at the wedding, Brooklyn." With that I watched Liam take a step forward and moving one foot after the other, I felt my chest tighten as he never took a step back or a glance behind him. For all he knew I could have collapsed on the ground. But he had his back to me, his mind somewhere else and his heart shut down, and now under permanent lock and key.

•••

I didn't stay and watch him walk away. I turned my back on him the same way he did to me. I walked away from there thinking it was all just a miss understanding, it will all blow over soon. But I knew deep down, it was everything but that. I had hurt him, and I had no idea how.

I snuck around the front of the house, not giving any of my family members a chance to spot me. I made it all the way to the front porch before I collapsed in tears. I brought my knees up to my chest and buried my face away from everything around me. I blew it. I blew all my chances at happiness and a better life. I blew my chances at getting back to normal. Everybody has their downfall and mine was communication. I should have realized all of Liam's built up emotions. What kind of person was I when I couldn't even take a moment, sit him down and ask him what was so obviously wrong. I should have realized our trust was falling, but I should have realized most if all that there was no spark, he's in love with the wrong girl.